


Tuesday will be Doom Day

by Zoodan21



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Small Town, Angst, Cults, Falling In Love, Hot Chocolate, Kidnapping, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Small Towns, almost american gothic, coffee as a plot point, emotional conversations in a car, late night road trips, neon noir
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2020-12-27 21:31:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 27,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21125555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoodan21/pseuds/Zoodan21
Summary: Here’s what you need to know about Moonville:It has a population of 4093 people, it’s in the middle of nowhere, it has one way out of the town and the diner that’s open 24/7 serves milkshakes and tacos. It’s a quiet place, people greeting neighbors on their way to work every morning and no rushing to be had anywhere.Moonville had been Taako’s boring hometown for the past 23 years, and there’s no sign of him getting away from there.But that's all about to change when Kraviz and Angus arrive to the diner in the middle of the night, running from a past that's trying very hard to catch up to them.





	1. A rainy night

**Author's Note:**

> ahhhh welcome to my new fic!!! I've apparently decided that the only thing I can write is weird stories that always end up being horrible in one way or another so here's my next one :) 
> 
> Title is from Bastille's 4AM

Here’s what you need to know about Moonville:

It had a population of 4093 people, it was in the middle of nowhere, it got one way out of the town and the diner that’s open 24/7 serves milkshakes and tacos. It’s a quiet place, people greeting neighbors on their way to work every morning and no rushing to be had anywhere.

Moonville had been Taako’s most boring nightmare the past 23 years of his life. 

It’s borderlining on claustrophobic and there’s a big risk that you might end up dating someone who you share a relative with. The roads haven’t been fixed since the 70’s and there’s no way to keep a secret for more than a week before the whole town finds out about it. Taako knew which car belonged to whom based on the register plate and he knew almost always what people were going to order before they step through the doors to the diner. 

The whole town could probably die and it would be the most exciting thing to happen to it. 

Honestly Taako would prefer to die during his shift tonight. He’d worked at  _ Garfield’s Diner! The Only Place With Taco Tuesday 24/7  _ for the past two years and he was no stranger to long nights without customers, hours dragging by until he either got to go home or the morning crowd came. But it was raining outside on a Tuesday at 3 AM and the neon sign outside had been glitching like crazy so the chance of getting any customers were below zero. 

He’d already cleaned the kitchen, swept the floor, and around one hour ago even deep cleaned the faded pink vinyl couches and barstools all over the diner. The upside of being there alone was that Taako could play his own music and not listen to the royalty free generic pop music playing in the background during the day, but there was only so much cleaning one dude could do before he got bored of that too. 

Sighing and stretching his arms over his head Taako walked over to the milkshake machine, making the third chocolate strawberry milkshake for himself that night. He only had to suffer through one more hour before he was free to bike home and sleep, and maybe by then the rain would be gone so he didn’t have to be soaked before he got into bed. 

The rain smattered against the windows facing the road, the water on the ground and running down the glass, reflecting the mix of neon and street light into the restaurant, and Taako slurped on his milkshake, the sound echoing around the space. 

He pearked up when two bright headlights lit up the street outside and then almost blinding him when the car turned into the diners parking. Taako immediately put down the milkshake and straightened up. Most likely it was a group of highschoolers who’d met up and were ignoring the fact that their school started in less than five hours, but customers were customers, even if all they wanted was a milkshake and fries. 

The headlights turned off, and the pink light of the sign reflected on the dark hood of the car and the two doors that opened and closed. 

The bell over the door made a sound as the two people entered and Taako tried not to raise his eyebrows in surprise. He didn’t recognize the customers at all. Sure sometimes there would be people who drove through the town or strangers who were visiting their families but it was rare enough that Taako always got intrigued by new faces. 

There were two of them. The man was tall with messy black curly hair going to his shoulders and covering the top of his black coat that went down below the knees of his faded dark jeans. His companion was much younger with round glasses and dressed like he’d just stepped outside the door prepared to go to church on Sunday, was holding a duffle bag close to his side with both hands on the strap. They could be related but Taako doubted they were father and son, the man couldn’t be much older than Taako and the child was maybe 10. 

Allowing himself one more moment of taking in the customers before walking over to greet them Taako pretended to re-tie his apron. On his way from behind the counter he grabbed two menus and plastered on his best customer service smile. 

“Hello and welcome to Garfield’s Diner! Where would you like to sit?” He’d have the same greeting phrase since he started working, complete with his voice raising about two octaves to sound more cheerful. 

“Oh um,” The tall man looked around the restaurant, hands tugging on the sleeves of his coat. “As far away from the window as possible? Please.” He gave Taako a tight lipped smile, and the little dude by his side nodded and made a little confirming noise. 

“Sure! I’ve got a table over here, if you’ll follow me…” He led them over to one of the booth’s closest to the back wall where the counter and kitchen were also and placed the menus on the table and waited for the two to get seated. “So my name is Taako and I’ll be your waiter for tonight, do you know what you want or do you want to look at the menu for a lil’ bit?” 

“We’re gonna look for a moment, or do you want something to drink now Angus?” The man turned his head from looking at Taako to his companion, who was holding up the menu and looking through the list of drinks. 

“Do you have milk?” He asked, smiling slightly at Taako and blinking slowly, looking very tired. 

“Yeah sure, anything else?” 

“I’ll have a coffee, no cream or anything.” The man said, his cheekbones illuminated by the glowing outline of a flamingo hanging in the wall and showing off the bags under his eyes. They both looked worse for wear now when they were sitting down, both slumping over the table and wearing the same kind of polite smiles. Taako was very used to that sort of smile. 

“Mhm got it. I’ll be out with your drinks in just a moment and you can figure out what you want to have for… Breakfast?” It definitely wasn’t the right word but it would have to do. 

There was an awkward silence for a moment, Angus looked up from where he’d been reading the menu at his maybe-father, maybe-brother, dude-he-was-with’s with wide eyes. The man looked at Taako, gave another awkward smile and then nodded at Angus encouraging.

“Sir? It says here that breakfast items are only available from six to ten? Isn’t it a bit too early for that?” Taako blinked at him and Angus raised his shoulders, staring down at the table somewhere above where his menu was placed. “I- I didn’t mean to be rude or ‘nything.” He mumbled. 

God, Taako had never thought that kids were cute before but shit. “Oh don’t worry about it, I’m the only one here tonight and I won’t snitch on myself. If you want to have morning pancake tacos go for it ya know?” 

“Pancake tacos?” Cheekbone dude sounded amused, arm on the table and his head resting on his hand. 

“ _ Morning  _ pancake tacos, we got regular pancake tacos as well, but were closer to breakfast than dinner so.” Taako shrugged, leaning against the counter behind him, the customers didn’t seem stressed so he had no reason not to stand around and chat for a moment. Besides the dude was handsome, even if he looked tired as hell. 

The man nodded and accepted Taako’s answer like it was a reasonable statement. Which it really wasn’t, it was just that it was easier to prepare breakfast than to make a whole lunch meal, and he’d spent so many hours doing nothing that making anything more complicated than pancakes just seemed awful. 

“May I please have the morning pancake taco please.” Angus said, giving the menu back to Taako and folding his hands into his lap. It took everything Taako had to not grin like a maniac. It was official; this child owned his heart. 

“I’ll have the soft shell waffles?” The man furrowed his eyebrows, and bit his lip. “Aren’t waffles supposed to be, uh, firm?” 

Taako had never seen anyone so unsure about waffe facts before, but then again most people who visited the diner knew the menu and didn’t really question the names just ordered their regular and moved on. Most people also didn’t visit at 3AM when it was raining outside with a child in tow, this could have been the regular attitude for outsiders for all he knew. “Oh don’t worry I’m like a master at making waffles at this point, it’s gonna be a good waffle for fuckin sure.” 

“I’ll trust you then.” Smiling the man handed the menu back to Taako, and leaned back against the sofa. 

“I’ll just need your names and I’ll be off!” He absolutely didn’t but what good was it to have complete control over the place for a night if he didn’t execute it? He just wanted to know their names, it wasn’t often he met new people. 

“Oh, uh. K- Kravitz and Angus McDonald?”

“Perfect!” Taako ignored how unsure Kravitz sounded, he was obviously tired after all. “I’ll bring it all out as soon as it’s done!” 

From the kitchen he could see how Angus pulled a map out from his bag and placed it on the table, pointing at one spot and then pulling a pen from his pocket and circling the spot. Taako didn’t live in the most advanced town but nobody younger than Merle used an actual physical map. By the time he was back with the waffles and pancakes the map was gone from the table, but there was a napkin that Angus had written something on, but Taako couldn’t see what it said beyond Kravitz name. 

“Okay here you go, one black coffee and soft shell waffles and a glass of milk with morning pancake tacos. Enjoy!” He placed down the food and drinks and took a step back. “If you want anything else I’ll be over by the register so just wave and I’ll see you.” 

“Oh thank you. I got a question and you don’t need to answer it, but is there any place we can stay at around here? A motel or anything like that?” Kravitz asked, hands around the coffee cup. Angus, who had been carefully cutting the pancakes into neat squares, stopped. 

“Well,” Taako begun and stopped for a moment to think. He could direct them to the motel, but it was far away and last time he heard all of the rooms smelled of mold and dirt, or he could make something  _ exciting  _ happen. Two new strangers in town that rolled in in the middle of the night would get them all buzzing with curiosity. And Kravitz looked good, Taako wouldn't mind staring at him a bit more. “There’s a motel like three hours away but it’s really bad, we’re talking a real yikes situation here. But my neighbor is renting out a room though, I can check if she’s willing to do some short term arrangement if you’re interested?”

“At this time?” Questioned Angus, eyes round behind his glasses.

“Yeah it’ll be no problem, she doesn’t exactly do sleep.” Taako shrugged his shoulders. Lucretia was mostly known for either her books or for stumbling into the coffee shop in town at 4pm like she just got out of bed. And if she said no well then, Taako had a guest room even if he used it as an extra wardrobe. 

Technically, he wasn’t allowed to carry his phone around with him at work, but nobody could see it in the pocket of his apron, so it took no time at all to call Lucretia. 

“Hello Taako, you know it’s very late right?”

“Hi! Yeah I’m still at work but listen I gotta ask you for a favor sorta.” He twirled one finger around a piece of hair by his face. “That room you talked about renting out, is it still a thing?”

“Yes but I’m not sure why you’re asking, you have a home Taako.”

“I know but I got two dudes here at the diner that are looking for a place to stay ‘nd I don’t feel like sending good paying customers to the motel the next town over.”

“I,” She sighed, “Can I talk to one of them please?” 

Taako handed the phone over to Kravitz who carefully placed it against his ear. “Hello? Hi ma’am… Yeah me and my uh brother are looking for a place to stay… Kravitz and Angus McDonald, we’ll pay in cash if that’s okay? Great thank you so much we’ll be by as soon as we’re done here.” His shoulders relaxed, and Taako hadn’t even noticed he’d been tense this entire time. “Once again thank you so much.” 

He handed the phone back to Taako, and their fingers just barely touched each other, but Taako felt it like a surge through his entire body. This was something new, something that wasn’t from Moonville and he wanted to hold onto it. 

“So I take it that it went well?” Kravitz nodded, and Taako smiled, feeling more alive than he’d done the whole night. “Yknow I get out of here in like half an hour, so if you finish up by then I can like navigate you there.”

The rest of Taako’s shift passed quickly, and when it was 4AM he clocked out. He biked alongside Kraitz car in the rain on the way back home, focusing on the headlights lighting up the old streets in front of them and still feeling the electricity in his body. 


	2. Coffee and chocolate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sad that i'm not able to participate in nanowrimo this year :( i just started studying french so that takes up a Lot of my time besides work. I'll try to stick to my every 2 weeks updating schedule with this fic tho from now on! 
> 
> Hope you like this chapter

Lucretia wasn’t exactly Taako’s neighbor, she lived one street over, but Moonville was so small that anyone that lived within seven streets were neighbors. Taako supposed he was lucky, being 23 and living in a house, even if it was a small one, on his own. It was the only perk of living in the middle of nowhere, cheap mortgages. 

The house Lucetia owned wasn’t far from the coffee shop/convenience store/gas station that served the cheapest coffee in town and 15 different energy drinks. It was without a doubt, Taako’s favorite place in the whole town. Therefore it was only right that he should by a cup of coffee and chocolate to the newcomers in town and swing by Lucretia to drop it off. 

Just normal neighbor stuff. 

Besides, Taako wouldn’t mind seeing Kravitz again and ask him about his life in a non-creepy way. It was a stupid curiousity but he couldn’t quench it. He probably had at most three days or something before Kraviz and Angus moved on to the next place, and Taako would be left with his dull life again. He didn’t want to miss a single moment of this short lived excitement. 

So there he was, standing outside Lucretia’s blue door, holding 4 cups in his hands and ringing the doorbell with his elbow. It was almost lunch and while Taako was used to having the most fucked up sleep schedule ever because of his job, he wasn’t sure that the same could be said for Kravitz. 

Biting his tongue, Taako shifted his stance and waited for someone to open the door. Come to think of it, he wasn’t sure if the coffee would be appreciated. Helping someone with finding a place to stay versus showing up the next day outside of work and with hot drinks sounded  _ overbearing _ . Way to be needy or whatever. 

The lock in the door turned and Taako breathed out. He’d just say hi to Lucretia and dump the drinks on her and bike back home and curl up on the sofa and sleep for the rest of the day. He wouldn’t even have to see Kravitz and make a fool of himself. 

“Oh Taako!” Said Kravitz, as soon as he opened the door, “Hello!”

Well. Life really was a bitch huh. 

“Hi, I wanted to give you some coffee?” Taako tried to smile and look natural, but it felt more like he was just showing off his teeth. If his hands weren’t occupied he’d probably be hiding his face but now all he could do was look at Kravitz and pretend that the man wasn’t dressed super sharp and how his dark button up was much more classy than Taako’s orange sweatshirt. 

“Thank you so much. Lucretia is currently out, I’m sorry that you missed her.” Stepping back, Kravitz opened the door wider for Taako with an apologetic smile on his face. 

“Oh no like I got coffee for you and hot chocolate for Angus as well. Thought I’d welcome you to the town or something.” Taako said, and walked into the living room. He knew Lucretia's house like his own, and it wasn’t like she was gonna object to him showing up, he’d gotten coffee for her as well. 

“That’s very nice of you,” Kravitz was following behind him, “I’m afraid we won’t be able to repay you anytime soon though…” His hands were clasped together and his back was straight. 

“Don’t even worry about it dude, it’s the best cheapest coffee this town has to offer.” He handed one of the cups over to Kravitz. He must have missed it yesterday, but the skin on Kravitz knuckles were a deep pink color, contrasting to the rest of his midnight skin. In fact, his hands were in rough shape, long bony fingers covered on old scraps and the skin on the top of his fingers were dry. But his nails were clean, and Taako thanked the heavens for that, because a man with unkempt nails was not worth having. 

There was silence for a moment, where they both stood there facing each other. Biting the inside of his lip, Taako felt anxiety fall on his shoulders. This was why he had worried about facing Kravitz, yeah he might be something new but… but Taako wasn’t used to  _ new.  _ Hell, more people moved away from Moonville than people who came to stay. 

“Well, so uh did you sleep well?” He ended up asking before taking a sip of his coffee. 

Kravitz practically lit up. “Yes! I got a whole five hours, it was very refreshing.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Thank you so much once again for helping us out with this, I really didn’t want Angus to have to sleep in the backseat of the car another night. He’s still growing, it isn’t good for him.”

“I, how are you even standing right now? God if I don’t sleep like at least eight hours my body collapses,” Taako sighed and raised his cup, “Cheers to coffee or somethin’.”

“Cheers?” Kravitz raised his cup to his lips and took a sip. “Mh, I thought you said you got coffee?” He looked at Taako confused, brows furrowed and a bit of foamed milk on his upper lip. 

“Yeah it’s a cappuccino with one pump of chocolate and light skimmed milk, you’ve never tried it before? Like it’s not a typical combination but it’s basically just coffee and milk.” It was also what Taako got every day after he’d worked a night shift to treat himself. 

Kravitz frowned. “No? I didn’t even know there was such a thing, I actually started drinking coffee like a week ago!” He laughed for a moment, short and self deprecating. “I’m glad that Angus got to try hot chocolate finally at least, he seems to like it a lot.” 

“O-oh?” Taako stuttered. “Good thing I got him some more then!” He said, desperately trying to lighten the mood. This was not what he expected at all. It seemed downright impossible to grow up not drinking hot chocolate or avoid coffee for more than 20 years, but maybe there were towns that were even more closed off than Moonville, so old school that they didn’t even stock coffee in the stores. Fuck, Kravitz could be ex-amish for all Taako knew. 

“That’s perfect Taako.” Once again Kravitz was back to smiling. Taako swallowed. He could really have used a warning before hearing his name being said in such a tender and genuine way. “What did you say was in this? I want to remember it so I can try it some other time.”

“Cappuccino, spelt with double p’s and c’s.” He took a breath. “If you want, we could go down to the café, they serve the  _ proper _ stuff and Angus can try some hot cocoa made from actual chocolate and not just hot water and powder.”

“I’ve never heard a better idea in my life.”

  
  
  
  


There was one good café in town, situated on the main street in a two story blue house and a small sign hanging from the side. The floors were worn, all of the tables were made from thick wood with heat marks on them and the lightbulbs were held up by old belts people around the city had donated. 

_ The Coffee House _ was the heart of the town, and the only place that wasn’t taken over by blinking neon light signs. Taako loved it. 

He’d spent countless hours there, sitting at the table by the window looking out over the road outside, drinking coffee (or on the occasions when that had been too expensive, water), and almost always hanging out with Lup. It was their place, where they’d meet up and talk about anything and everything. Taako had probably cried at that table more times than he’d cried at home. 

So when he brought Kravitz and Angus there he made sure to grab another table, one far away from the windows by Kravitz request. Soft music was playing from a speaker somewhere, and there was a candle lit on the table. Outside in the distance, there was the sound of thunder. It was the perfect time for hot chocolate.

“Okay how about this, I surprise you with something of the menu and you’ll wait here and if you don’t like it I’ll owe you one.” Taako said, already digging after his card that he’d put in one of his pockets. 

“Sounds good.” Kravitz smiled, and took off his coat. It was beginning to turn into fall, and the rain from yesterday had left a chill in the air. “I’m sure you’d pick something better than me anyways.” 

“Uhuh. If you say so?” Taako was once again hit with the realization that he didn’t know these people and no matter how interesting or new they might be, Kravitz and Angus would probably be gone in a few days. And then life would be back to how it always was. 

Normal everyday life included Istus standing behind the counter, preparing coffee with her long white hair pulled up into a bun. She was wearing the same brown apron as always and a knitted sweater with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. Taako knows that logically Istus had started working there when she got out of high school, and that she was probably around 30 now but to him, she still looked like the same as she’d done the first he walked through the doors. 

“Hey.” He said, leaning against the counter, “What’s today’s special?”

“Same as it always is on tuesdays Taako, black coffee and a blueberry muffin for five dollars.” She responded, not looking up from whatever latte art she was creating.

“Yes but, consider this, the same deal but instead of coffee I get a hot chocolate and a blueberry muffin. And if you’re feeling  _ really  _ generous you could make me a matcha latte and a caramel macchiato as well.” He grinned at her. “I’ll even tip you, 20%.”

Istus laughed, handed the cup over to Noelle who was waiting for it and went back to the counter. “20% of five dollars is nothing Taako, but I’ll take your hot chocolate deal. Are the drinks for your new friends?” 

“Yeah, they’re staying at Lucretia’s for a while.” There was no point in not telling her, she’d either find out via him or somebody else in town in a day.

“Oh yes she’s been having that room out for rent for a while now! How nice that someone wanted to stay there.” Istus smile could probably melt icebergs and the best part was that she was always looked so genuinely happy. “Speaking of, when’s Lup coming back from college? It’s been a while since I saw you two together.”

“I don’t know, she’s really busy with school ‘n’ work.” Taako looked away from Istus, focusing on the menu behind her. Lup was in her second year at college a good five hours away, and she’d come back to town whenever she had a weekend over and it wasn’t that Taako blamed her for staying away for a long time.. He just missed her a bit. “She’s talked about bringing Barry next time though, do you remember him? It’s her very nerdy boyfriend.”

“Hmm, he’s the one that ordered a coffee and spilled it all over his jeans right?” She said, moving to grab the blueberry cupcake from the counter.

“Yeah!”

“Well you gotta bring them here next time they’re back! In fact, why don’t you tell me when you know which date they’ll be back and me and Raven can host a dinner or something.” She placed the drinks and cake on a tray and handed it over to Taako. “Hope your new friends enjoy their drinks.”

“Thank you so much Istus. I’ll make sure to tell you when Lup is back!” He went back to the table where Kravitz and Angus were sitting. 

Angus eyes was buried in a book with a neon purple cover and the words Animus Bell - The True Prophecy written in gold letters. In one hand he had a highlighter and there was a stack of small yellow post-it notes on the table, and Taako could see about a bunch of them sticking out from the pages of the book as well. Kravitz was murmuring something to Angus, too low for Taako to hear what it was. 

As soon as they noticed him though they both hurried to put everything away and Kravitz smiled at him assuring. “Taako, you’re back!”

“Yeah got your drinks as well.” He placed the tray on the table and slid into the chair beside Kravitz. “Okay there’s a matcha latte and a caramel macchiato, and the first one is coffee, milk and this green japanese powder that’s really healthy. And the second one is milk foam and coffee, basically the same, and caramel mixed into it, now which one do you want?” 

He pushed both drinks towards Kravitz who chewed on his lower lip, dark eyes looking from one cup to the other. “I don’t know.” He paused, “Which one would you like to have more?” 

“Oh nah dude this is about  _ your  _ coffee adventure. I can’t have someone walk around not knowing coffee.” Truthfully Taako really wanted the matcha latte but he wasn’t about to tell Kravitz that. It felt important to let Kravitz make his own decision about this, as silly as it was. 

Kravitz breathed out and tapped one finger on the table, focusing intently on the drinks. “Okay. I’ll take the… The matcha please.”

“Perfect! Don’t worry if you don’t like that we can totally switch drinks, were here to broaden your horizon not force ya to drink something you don’t like. The same goes for you Ango.” He placed the last cup in front of Angus who grabbed it with both hands. 

“Mister Taako? My name is Angus, not- It doesn’t end in an o.” He said, not meeting Taako’s eyes, but instead focusing just above them, an embarrassed flush on his face. Biting his tongue Taako just barely managed to avoid grinning like a fool, god he’d never been called mister before by a 12 year old. It was very endearing.

“Oh it’s a nickname, Angus, Ango, same thing. So I got hot chocolate for you Ango, and it’s Istus homemade which is miles better than the one at the restaurant.” He winked at Angus, who didn’t seem sure if he should smile back or not. 

“Do I have to have a nickname?” He questioned, leaning forward on his elbows. 

“You don’t have to have a nickname Angus, but why don’t you try it for a while?” Kravitz cut in, “If you don’t like it I’m sure Taako can call you whatever you want.” He shot Taako a look from the side, jaw set. 

“Of course, and like, you can get a new nickname if you want! ‘s all up to you little buddy.” Taako said. Angus seemed to think it over for a moment before leaning back in his chair and nodding. “Great! So why don’t you try your drinks and then you can tell me what you think and we can get to know each other a bit better.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all of the coffee mentioned in this chapter i recommend!! Especially Matcha latte!! 
> 
> Oh btw the place that Taako gets cheap coffee from is based on wawa, 1 out of the 2 things i love about new jersey! The Coffee House is based on Espresso House, a nordic chain that serves good and expensive drinks and yes i've cried like 5 times at the one in my town next question 
> 
> My Tumblr is [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com) come by and say hi! I sometimes post art,


	3. A conversation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 weeks i said, and yet here i am a month later

_ “Great! So why don’t you try your drinks and then you can tell me what you think and we can get to know each other a bit better.”  _

Taako wasn’t known for being subtle, he was good at avoiding subjects sure, but he’d never had the energy to sit for hours talking in circles before finally getting to the point of it all. There wasn’t anything wrong with asking someone a question anyways, if Kravtiz didn’t want to answer then that was his problem, not Taako’s. 

But he also really wanted to know what Angus and Kravitz thought about their drinks. So he waited patiently while they both took the first sip, studying the way Kravitz kept his face blank and Angus eyebrows furrowed as he concentrated on the taste. 

Carefully placing the cup of homemade hot chocolate back on the table, Angus leaned back into the seat and looked down at the table, hands tightly clasped together. His thumbs twitched involuntarily. “It was good.”

“Oh really? Was it better than the one you had this morning?” Taako narrowed his eyes. He didn’t believe for one second that Angus actually liked the drink, not when he was avoiding looking at either Taako or Kravitz. 

“Yes.” Angus nodded, not looking up. A small tremor overtook his hands for a moment before he stilled them again, and Taako frowned. He wasn’t used to kids lying but he could have sworn that when he was young he hadn’t acted so, so  _ afraid  _ as Angus was. 

Thankfully Kravitz seemed to notice as well, and his hand reached across the table to cover Angus’. His long, delicate fingers carefully wrapped around the smaller hand, and under the light of the cafe Taako could clearly see that the pink on his knuckles were old scars, not completely healed. The skin around was lighter and smooth, the mark of other scars from long ago. He didn’t want to think about where Kravitz could have gotten them from. Was it an accident that recurred, or did Kravitz have to use his fists regularly? And in that case, was it self defence or to attack? 

“Remember what we talked about in the last town Angus?” Kravitz said concerned. “Having opinions is okay yeah?”

“Yeah.” Whispered Angus, still looking down at the table, but Taako could see his hand turn and grip Kravitz own.

“Right, and there’s no right or wrong here. Taako only wants to know what you like, nothing else.” He glanced at Taako, who nodded quickly. It was sweet to hear Kravitz say his name in that tone, low and soothing. 

“If you don’t like it that’s cool too Ango, don’t pretend for my sake or somethin’.” Fuck, was Taako bad at talking to children. He didn’t even know how old Angus was, not that it mattered because Taako spoke to all children in the exact same way, he couldn’t tell a 5 year old from an 11 year old. Shit what if Angus was 5 years old and Taako just hadn’t noticed. 

A smile tugged at Kravitz lips, and he gave Taako a small nod in acknowledgement. 

“I, um-” Angus swallowed and looked up, jaw set and only looking at Kravitz. “I didn’t like it that much.” He finished in a rush, face turning red very quickly. 

“And that’s perfectly okay, now we all know and next time we’re here we’ll order something else for you. Having opinions is good, no matter what they are. Remember that.” Kravitz thumb were running circles over the back of Angus hand. 

For the first time Taako noticed that Angus knuckles had the same light misscoloring as the old faded scars on Kravitz knuckles, and it felt like someone had poured ice water along his spine, but he didn’t know why. 

“Yeah.” Angus said again, pushing the cup away from himself and after another moment kravitz withdrew his hand, staring into space. A heavy silence settled over the table. Taako didn’t know what to do, so he grabbed his cup of macchiato and took a sip, trying to fill the awkwardness with something else. It didn’t work. 

He waited a little longer to see if the others would make a sound, but it was clear that neither Kravitz nor Angus was gonna say the first word, so he decided to try with another question. Hopefully this one will get better results. Taako could clearly see how in the future he’d think back to this moment and he’d just about  _ die  _ from embarrassment. 

“So… Where are you from?” His tongue felt heavy in his mouth and the words came out stilted, and Taako just wanted to bang his head into the table. 

“Oh!” Kravitz shook his head, blinking. “Felicity Wilds? I don’t know if you’ve heard of it but it’s got a pretty good university.” 

Taako gasped. “Holy fuck are you seroius? Oh my god my sister Lup goes to the university there! Dude that’s so far away.”

“Yeah, it took us quite a while to get here!” Kravitz smiled, but it didn’t really reach his eyes. It was probably just leftover concern for Angus, probably. “What’s your sisters major?”

“She’s studying advanced mathematics, she recently changed over from psychology. Wait, do you go to the school as well? Do you know her?” He said, excitement coursing through his body, he hadn’t expected any specific answer but this was better than anything he could have ever guessed at.

“Oh no, my family just lived close by. I never really had, plans i guess, to go study.” Kravitz said, and he turned solemn for a second before smiling even brighter. “It’s a wonderful place though, and advanced mathematics sounds really hard!”

“Yeah Lup is like, almost a genius.” Not that Taako would ever tell her that to Lup’s face, but it had been a while since he’d seen her, and he was starting to miss her. So sue him if he wanted to spend a moment explaining to Kravitz how cool his sister was, it was what she deserved. “She’s got a scholarship and everything, but she took the car with her when she moved so I haven’t been able to go and visit her…” 

He sighed. He loved that Lup had managed to get out of Moonville, had managed to create a life outside of their small town with it’s taco diner and one good coffee shop, but it felt lonely without her. She was moving on in life, and Taako was still left, still in the same place he’d been two years ago. It sometimes hurt to think about, and he tried his best to ignore the hollow feeling in his stomach when talking about it.

He also ignored how Kravitz would leave just like her, even if there was a guarantee of Lup coming back and visiting him, it was stupid to get so attatched to a stranger that was only traveling trough. 

Kravitz shrugged. “Well, I mean it’s not that impressive, it’s got the university or Wo- the religious side and that’s about it.” He gestured to the coffee shop, “You won’t find a place like this in Felicity Wilds.” 

“Yeah, I guess,” Taako exhaled, shoulders slumping down a bit. “It’s just, I’ve never been outside of this town before yknow? Like properly gone and seen other places, I sorta wish I could do that.”

Laughing, Kravitz nodded before saying, “This is the first time me and Angus have been outside of Felicity Wilds, so yeah I understand you. Sometimes you just need to  _ get out.”  _

“Exactly! Fuck I’m so tired of this town, nothing ever happens here, like ever! Ugh okay I’m gonna, like overshare here if that’s cool, but I’m really happy that you two rolled into town, it’s been interesting to meet new people.” Taako hoped the heat he could feel on his cheeks weren’t visible, he hadn’t planned on saying that, but it felt right, and based on the smile on Kravitz face, big and bright and showing off his perfect teeth, it was right. 

“I’m really happy that we met you too Taako. It’s helped more than you’ll ever know.” Kravitz said and then hurriedly picked up his coffee cup. It was very cute, according to Taako.

“Yeah well, whenever I’m not working I’m available as town and coffee guide, the bad news is that we’ve seen like one third of the place already but the good news is that we got plenty more coffee to try.” He joked and Kravitz laughed, foam on the top of his lips.

“I’ll take you up on that! I want to go through this whole menu before we leave.” He said, and Taako felt his smile freeze on his face. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t expected of course, he knew that Kravitz and Angus would move on sooner or later, but it didn’t feel great to hear it out loud. In fact, it felt like the opposite of great. 

He swallowed. “Are you going back to Felicity Wilds after this?” 

“No. I’m not gonna go back there ever again.” The distant look was back in Kravitz eyes, and his smile disappeared in the blink of an eye. On the table he clenched his fists and the pink scars stretched tight across his knuckles. Taako couldn’t help but think that whatever caused the injury, it had been left in Felicity Wilds. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come talk to me on tumblr [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com)  
i've recently started listening to the magnus archives and i'm so excited about all the horror and the inspiration I'm getting from it!!


	4. Green Iced Tea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi i hope your holidays were good and that they weren’t too stressful!   
I'm starting university in about uhhh 14 days so im super exited for that and i hope the rest of you get some wonderful changes to your lives this year!!! 
> 
> Most of this was writing on an iPad so if there’s any spelling mistakes i apologise, despite that I really loved writing this chapter

_ Here’s what you need to know about Moonville: _

_ It has a population of 4093 people, it’s in the middle of nowhere, it has one way out of the town and the diner that’s open 24/7 serves milkshakes and tacos. It’s a quiet place, people greeting neighbors on their way to work every morning and no rushing to be had anywhere. _

Here’s what you also need to know about Moonville:

It has one highschool, the local radio station only plays country songs and the drive to the nearest mall is two hours. The carpenter is right next to the flower shop, both stores have a sticker on their front door proclaiming ‘Support Small Businesses!’ and one street over from that is the wooden church called Highcurch Church. 

Taako lived on the same street as the priest from the church. Priest was probably a generous word for Merle Highchurch, but he was the one that took care of the church and had for as long as Taako could remember, he was pretty sure that Merle had baptised him actually. Highchurch Church had another official name, but the wooden sign hanging over the entryway has been carved ages ago and nobody could make out what the curly text said, so Highchurch Church it was. 

Merle would walk around the town dressed in different hawiian shirts with cargo shorts and flip-flops no matter what the weather was, always up for talking with the people he passed and more often than not he was carrying a new flower he’d bought for the church or his own garden. Before every Sunday service he’d go down to the Taco Diner and order the same meal and an extra large glass of sweet ice tea to go with it. 

This Sunday was no different. Taako was once again back at work, trying to hide his sighs of boredom as he talked to customers and took orders. Everything was back to normal. Nothing new or exciting had happened.

Kravitz and Angus had been in town for about a week, Taako had given them the tour around the city twice, and invited them over for dinner once, which they’d declined, and brought them back to  _ The Coffee House  _ for more coffee experiences. In the back of his head Taako knew he shouldn’t be getting attached. It was like he could taste it in the air, the inevitable of Kravitz and Angus departure, and it left ice in his stomach and a nasty nail biting habit. 

Maybe that was the price of wanting excitement in a small town. It eventually passed. 

So he better get used to the normality again, starting with taking Merle’s order. One good thing about small towns was that everyone sorta knew which booth in the restaurant was who’s, and by the time Merle walked through the doors Taako had cleaned the table and placed one menu on the spot where he always sat. Yknow, good customer service and all that. 

The neon sign on the wall still glowed in the daylight over the booth where Merle was sitting. His shirt matched the pink glow, and he must have brushed his hair because it stood out around his head like a gray cloud. 

“Hey Merle, same as always?” Taako asked, same question as always. He was leaning against the table slightly, trying to go for a ‘I’m cool and casual with the customers’-look instead of the ‘oh dear god its one hour left and I think I might die I’m so tired’-look he was feeling.

“Yeahhh- oh actually I was thinking of mixing it up a bit today,” Merle rubbed his hands together, “Instead of my usual sweet iced tea I want  _ green  _ iced tea!” 

“So, like everything‘s the same but you want a different tea?” Well color Taako intrigued. Sure it wasn’t a big change but it was something, throughout the three years he’d worked at the diner Merle always ordered the same thing, he might as well tell Taako he was stopping being a vegetarian. 

“Yeah! I’m trying something new, felt like it was time to start now huh.” Merle said, laughing a bit. 

“Sure.” Narrowing his eyes at Merle, he took a step back from the table, “I’ll be right out with your  _ new  _ tea.” He tried to make it sound as suspicious as possible, because it was. But Merle only hummed in response and leaned back in his seat, content to just relax.

He returned later with the tacos and drink to Merle’s table and almost dropped the tray in his hand in shock.

Merle wasn’t alone.

Sitting across from him was Angus and Kravitz, with Angus waving shyly in Taako’s direction. Both of them were dressed in dress shirts and Kravitz had a black suit jacket on, and his shoes were shined. They looked so out of place sitting in the little diner with its bright and happy colors, and Merle that matched the interior. 

“Taako!” Kravitz exclaimed when he saw him, “You were busy when we got here and we didn’t want to disturb you.” The neon pink light reflected in the corner of his eyes like it was the first color to ever touch him, a sharp contrast to his dark and kind eyes and it was beautiful. 

“I didn’t even know you were coming here? I would have prepared something if you wanted me to.” Absentmindedly he sat down the meal in front of Merle and pretended that he wasn’t distracted enough to almost spill out the green tea. “Besides I only have one hour left before I get off anyways, you really didn’t have to come down here.”

“I thought about waiting for you to get off work but then I remembered that someone really really love hot chocolate.” He grinned and patted Angus head and tangled up his hair. Angus huffed and jabbed his elbow into Kravitz side before running his hands through his curls, eyes rolling. 

“Are you sure you’re not just spoiling him?” Taako teased, and suddenly the hour he had until the end of his shift didn’t seem so bad. 

“Oh I definitely am, but I think he deserves it.” The soft smile was back on Kravitz face as it always was when he was talking about Angus. It was a smile that Taako would die for, but in a, like, totally cool and casual way. 

From the corner of his eye Taako could see Merle wiggle his eyebrows and dramatically looking from him to Kravitz. He mentally told Merle to shut up and eat his tacos. 

“And what about you?” Taako said, taking himself and Kravitz off guard.

“What about me?” 

“Who’s spoiling you?” Taako was sure that his whole face was red as a cherry, but the words came out steady and sure. Was this flirting? Was he flirting? The neon from the sign reflected off Kravitz cheeks made it look like he was blushing as he tried to stammer out a response only to be interrupted by Angus clearing his throat.

“Excise me Mister Taako sir, I’d like to order one big hot chocolate, please.” He said, and it sounded rehearsed, like he’d practiced saying it in his head a million times before. He was also staring intensely at Taako with his nose scrunched up. 

“Sure! I’ll bring that right out! Why don’t you just uh, talk to Merle while you wait! I’m sure he’s got something to talk about!” And with that he walked quickly back to the counter and pretended like he needed to get something from the pantry before he went into the back room to bash his head against the wall for a few seconds in embarrassment. 

This was fine. Well it absolutely wasn’t but he was gonna pretend like it was. He was gonna focus on making the chocolate and nothing else, and if he grabbed the biggest glass they had for Angus and also made a cappuccino for Kravitz then that was only to distract himself. 

They were only staying for a few days in town anyways, it didn’t matter. Besides it wasn’t like Taako could get out of the town, Lup had taken the car when she’d gone to college and it was okay, Moonville wasn’t a bad place. Taako could survive living his whole life in the little town, with only people passing by in his life. 

Still, when he made the hot chocolate he made sure to grab the biggest glass he could find, and if he prepared a cappuccino for Kravitz then that was just for distraction purposes and to give himself more time to tame the blush on his face. 

He pointedly ignored the raised eyebrow from Merle when he returned to the table with the drinks, and placed them both down on the table. Kravitz seat was vacant, but Angus was sitting and reading the same book as he had when they’d gone to the cafe, Animus Bell - The True Prophecy written on the neon purple cover, and just as last time he had a bunch of post it notes sticking out of the book and a highlighter in his hand. 

“Whatcha reading Ango?” Taako asked instead of the actual question that he wanted to ask which was where Kravitz had gone to. It was very likely that he had escaped because Taako had been too much. 

“Animus Bell, it documents the most important texts and prophecies from our church.” He answered, and highlighted another line of text. Taako looked over at Merle, who was staring at the cover of the book with his brows furrowed and hands laced under his beard. 

“Oh? I’ve never heard of that book before, what church is it?” The little warmth left in his cheeks quickly disappeared, he didn’t get a good vibe from the look on Merle’s face. 

“Well it’s called- oh Kravitz you’re back!” He waved to Kravitz who walked in through the front doors with his hair laying in a mess over his shoulders from the wind blowing outside. 

“Yeah sorry I had to get some fresh air,” He coughed, and looked down at the coffee cup in front of him. “Taako I didn’t order this.”

Taako shrugged and the heat rushed back to his cheeks. “I know but I thought you deserved it. Hey don’t even worry about it, you deserve a hot drink once in a while don’t ya think?” 

“ _ Oh.”  _ Kravitz looked at him, eyes wide and dark and gleaming neon pink.

They could have probably spent the entire day staring at each other if it hadn’t been for Merle slurping his iced tea loudly, standing up and grabbing Taako by the elbow with a bright smile. “Well this has been fun boys but I need to pay and get to church and all that, cheers!” 

With that he dragged Taako back to the register. As soon as they were out of earshot Merle dropped the smile and grabbed a 20 from his pocket. “If I were you I’d do a bit of digging about that group of theirs, yeah?”

“Sure?” Raising his eyebrows Taako grabbed the 20 and grabbed the change from the register. “Is there something wrong?” 

“Nah I don’t think that there’s any problem but just maybe do a quick search on the google. Still, church is calling and I don’t think the people would be that patient with a priest running late! Keep the change!” With a laugh, he walked out the doors, leaving Taako with a handful of coins and a cool feeling in his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always I’m not American so if there’s stuff that’s not culturally then fuck that because the only real thing in this is Taako’s experience as a waiter okay that pain is universal 
> 
> If you want to find out more about cults and weird groups i suggest listening to **Oh No, Ross and Carrie!** another podcast on the maximum fun network and they have this Super Interesting series where they investigate scientology and one where they join flat earth so please check them out!! I love that show So So Much
> 
> See me scream on tumblr about Tma at Newspapernom <3


	5. Headlights in the window

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, sorry its been so long. I started university last week so its been an intense period!! I'm already on my second assignment and yeah its Ahhhh internal screaming the whole way down
> 
> I hope you all like this chapter!!

Taako was lounging on Lucretia’s couch. It was a very good cough to lounge on, with light blue fabric situated right under the window in the living room and filled with decorative pillows. Some of the pillows were hand embroidered by Istus, depicting stars and moons with thread in the same shade as the sofa. He was lightly tracing the lines of one of the stars with his finger, waiting for Lucretia to get back home. 

He had no idea where Kravitz and Angus had gone, their car was still in the driveway but he’d gone to the guest room and knocked and there had been no answer. He was relieved that they weren’t home though, even if the thought made him feel incredibly guilty. He hadn’t had time to sit down and google the title of Agnus book, he’d had to cover extra shifts at work and then he’d arrived back home and the furthest thing on his mind had been an obscure title. 

So he’d decided that the best course of action would be to ask Lucretia the next time they were having tea time. Partly gossip, partly drinking whatever obscure tea flavor Lucretia had bought for the occasion. Taako knew that Lucretia wasn’t all-knowing, but she was  _ intelligent _ , so even if she didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about, she’d have a much easier time figuring it out.

It wasn’t unusual for him to hang around Lucretia’s house, he had her spare key and she had his. Lup used to be the one holding on to both of their keys, but with her away to college they had to settle for each other. For Lucretia, this was a downgrade. Half the time Taako didn’t even know where he kept the key or he would go into Lucretia’s house to sleep on her sofa. It was, better, sometimes, than sleeping alone in his house. 

Outside it was raining hard, the water beating against the window and running down from the roof, making it impossible to see outside. The faint glowing outline of  _ Garfield’s Diner! The Only Place With Taco Tuesday 24/7  _ could be seen in the gray distance, occasionally joined by the headlights of passing cars, but none of them turned into the driveway. Taako sighed, and slumped down into the sofa even more. He was restless. 

On one hand he could just pull out his phone and google Agnus’ book and find out what was so special about it, if it was special at all. Merle could be a bit  _ weird,  _ and whatever he said should probably be taken with a grain of salt. But if there was something, something weird going on then Taako didn’t want to be alone in discovering it. 

He didn’t like the way he was feeling, the way his ribcage seemed too heavy, like every inhale lacked oxygen and no matter what he did his lungs were pressed down so tight that a deep breath was impossible. 

A mild suffocation, a slow growing worry. 

Had been it any other thing, had it been any other person passing through town with a strange book then Taako was sure that he wouldn’t have cared. It was different now though, and he didn’t know why. He wasn’t self centered or anything like that, but ever since Lup had left for college he had slowly started withdrawing from his friends, and he’d gotten used to being alone, to only hang around Lucretia and even then it didn’t feel the same as it had before with Lup there. 

Caring for someone that wasn’t Lup was new and interesting, and Taako sorta actually liked it. Buying coffee for Angus and Kravitz had become a habit the two weeks they’d been there, and showing them around time and for the first time ever he got to see Moonville from a new perspective. 

It didn’t change the fact that he didn’t  _ really  _ know them though, and Taako knew that the both of them kept a lot of secrets, and he’d done his best to ignore them, but it was becoming a little too much. Sure some people could go their whole lives without drinking hot chocolate but the way Angus reacted to it wasn’t normal, and he definitely didn’t like thinking about the fact that Kravitz hands were covered in scars and the way he’d flinched when Taako put his hand on his shoulder one time when they’d been out walking. Acknowledging it made his chest feel even more restricted, but it was something he had to do.

Another pair of headlights passed by the window outside, illuminating the living room for a short moment before disappearing. He sighed and turned over in the sofa, face mashed against the cushions. 

Taako didn’t know what to do. Hell, he didn’t even know if there was something he  _ could _ do. It was entirely possible that Kravitz and Angus were normal people and Taako was just so used to how things were in his small little town that he didn’t know how to deal with new people, that he were overreacting to what others might perceive as completely normal. He knew that was wrong though. 

He knew something was wrong the same way he knew he had a hard time breathing when worrying over Kravitz and Angus. He knew it the same way he knew that Angus had a weird preference for cheap hot chocolate and Kraviz loved coffee with names more complicated than he could pronounce but he’d always claim that he was fine with a plain black coffee. 

Finally, a sleek gray car barely visible in the rain pulled up to the driveway. Lucretia had arrived. Taako could have jumped in glee, but instead he just rolled off the sofa onto the floor with a groan. 

He waited until he heard the key turn in the lock before getting up from the floor, running a hand through his hair once to make sure that he at least looked a bit presentable. It didn’t work, going by the way Lucretia raised her eyebrows as soon as she got inside. 

“You know I have a hairbrush right?” Was the first thing she said. She hung up her beautiful gray coat on one of the hangers in the hallway, and despite only walking from the car to the door the shoulders were damp with rain. 

“Yeah but like I got a hair tie so I don’t see the problem.” Taako did not have a hair tie. He’d had one earlier that day, but he’d probably left it in the pocket of his apron. Lucretia did not need to know that, but judging by the still raised eyebrows she already knew. 

“I’m sure that’ll solve all your hair problems.” Lucretia relaxed her face and walked into the kitchen, glancing at the sofa. “How long have you been here anyways?” 

“Well, I’ve uh, I don’t know? Like half an hour at the most.” He shrugged and followed her, leaning against the counter.

“Sounds fake but okay.” 

“Yeah yeah whatever, I’ve prepared your teapot and mugs so we only need to heat up the water.” Taako looked to the living room, from where he was standing he could just see the window over the sofa. Another pair of headlights illuminated the room.

Next to him, Lucretia turned the kettle on. “Did you bring something? It’s been a while since you baked.”

“I did! I made a whole batch of macarons so you can have some for later! The jar is in the living room.” He said proudly. The macarons had turned out amazing, blackberry with raspberry cream in the middle decorated with gold powder. Lucretia was right, it had been a long time since he’d baked and it felt  _ good  _ to be back in his element. 

She grinned and fixed the tea. “Yeah? Well I’m  _ sure  _ that it’s got nothing to do with my new houseguests.” 

“Oh shut up.” Taako grabbed the cups and together they made their way over to the sofa and sat down. Lucretia crossed her legs and leaned back, holding her mug in one hand and reaching for a cookie with her other. There were circles under her eyes, illuminated from the light outside the window. Stange, the card hadn’t moved. 

They sat for a moment in silence, sipping their tea and Taako felt himself relax for the first time that night. The tea seemed to warm him from inside and the heaviness on his lungs disappeared little by little.

It was peaceful.

“So.” Lucretia said, when her mug was empty. “Why did you ask me to meet up?” Her blue eyes stared into him, and Taako couldn’t find it in himself to lie to her and tell her that everything was fine.

He sighed and clasped both hands around the warm mug. “I’m worried about Kravtiz and Angus. We were at my work the other day and Angus mentioned being part of some church and I mean that’s fine and all but, it’s all just a bit weird right? Nobody really stops by here unless they’re on their way somewhere else, and I don’t think anyone that just shows up at a diner in the middle of the night with no plan is just on a nice little road trip! And I’ve been hanging around them for like three weeks now, I should know something more than just oh yeah Angus hasn’t had hot chocolate ever before in his life! I don’t know how to explain it- it just feels  _ wrong _ .” 

Shit. Well he hadn’t meant to say that much, he’d wanted to broach the topic slowly. Not whatever word vomit that was, Jesus Christ on a stick.

Lucretia hummed. “You’re right. Being part of a church isn’t necessarily a strange thing. But the rest is concerning. Have you tried talking to Kravitz about it?” She glanced towards where the room that Kravitz and Angus were staying in. 

Taako shook his head. “I don’t know how to bring it up. Like, it would be way creepy to just slide up and go ‘hey so I’m low key concerned about whatever the fuck you’re doing here, anyways what’s the Animus Bell, no pressure just curious’.” 

“Taako, do you know what the Animus Bell is?” Lucretia asked. Her face was carefully blank, and eyes bright from the headlight outside. 

“Nah. Am I supposed to?” The rain was hitting the window, the sound echoing around the room and the uncomfortable feeling settled back in Taako’s chest. 

“No not really, it’s just something I got into a few years ago, a weird hyper fixation on cults, but we all go through that. Uhm well anyways. The Animus Bell was the symbol of a cult back in the 80’s, but they disbanded pretty quickly… There was a lot of rumors about torture and human sacrefices, normal cult activity- but that was all it was.” She paused, drumming her fingers against the sofa. “I know they claimed that the end of the world was coming and they knew how to stop it, but it was such a small and closed group that nobody took it seriously. Are you  _ sure  _ that was the book Angus was reading?”

Taako swallowed, mouth suddenly dry. “Yes. Said it belonged to their church and everything.”

“That is. That’s a bit concerning.” 

“Do you know where the, uh, cult or whatever used to hang out?” He asked, jaw clenching and barely brething. Please, please, please don’t say Felicity Wilds. Let it be somewhere that Taako’s never heard off and that Kravitz never mentioned and where Lup didn’t go to college. 

“I’m not sure, I think outside Felicity Wilds? I might be wrong, it was a good while since I read about this.” Lucretia must have seen the panicked look on Taako’s face, because she leaned forward and placed her hand on his shoulder. “Taako, breathe.” 

Fuck. 

He tried to do what she said. But god was it hard. His lungs felt crushed, caged in by his ribs and there was no air. He couldn’t fucking breathe. Fucking fuck. Perfect. So cool. His one friend was part of a fucking cult that was in the same town as his sister! And they sacrificed humans! 

He needed space. Or he needed air. Most of all he just needed to get out. Right now. 

Taako tumbled out from the sofa, mumbling an apology to Lucretia for knocking her hand away and bolted to the front door. The rain hit his face like an icy shower, soaking his clothes almost immediately. 

But the shock of it made it easier to breathe, and he stood there in the doorframe, hands braced on either side and just breathing, as the car with the headlights waiting outside slowly took off into the dusk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we got them facts!! or some of them at least! and a spooky car not at all inspired by my paranoia
> 
> listen to me rant about university and other weird stuff at @[Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com) im always up for a good conversation about cults and true crime! 
> 
> thank you for reading <3


	6. Sunday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, im sorry in advance   
also,,, maybe look at the tags, they've been updated

How do you confront someone who you know might be in a cult but they don’t know that you know? 

You avoid it. 

In fact, you avoid everyone who might be involved with the whole situation and pretend that everything is okay while slowly trying not to go insane. It’s not the smartest thing to do, but nobody can claim that Taako is especially  _ good _ at solving his problems in a mature and confrontational manner. 

The smart thing to do, the right thing to do might have been to talk to Kravitz, tell him about what he knew and then confront him about what the hell he was doing in a cult. But the problem with avoiding Kravitz was that he also couldn’t confirm that he was in a cult, and staging an intervention with no proof was, perhaps, a bit stupid. Still, it was something Taako had considered doing for about uh, .2 seconds. 

He just needed to gather the courage to actually handle the situation, for the last few days he’d been doing his best to focus on stuff that hadn’t anything to do with whatever the fuck went down in Felicity Wilds. 

If he didn’t know more about it that’s what Lucretia had told him it was fine, it wasn’t real. Cults weren’t a thing that happened to people, they were stuff he watched documentaries about on the TV at 4am after he had finished a 10-hour shift at work and he couldn’t fall asleep, cults happened back in the 80’s and involved murders and drugs and easily fooled white people in a desperate situations and tax scams. Cults didn’t happen to people like Kravtiz and Angus who were normal people. 

Except… Except they weren’t. Hadn’t he already established that? Kravitz and Angus were weird, and Taako didn’t know what to do with it. Was the fact that they’d never had coffee or hot chocolate a sign of them being in a cult, or the fact that they showed up in the middle of the night at  _ Garfield’s Diner!  _ Suspicious activities? They were strange yes, but were they strange enough to be a part of a cult? Taako honestly didn’t know, and it might have been stressing him out, just a tad. 

The solution to avoiding thinking of it all was to work a lot. He’d picked up any and every shift he could get, working the odd hours that nobody wanted and then sleeping the rest of the time, stubbornly ignoring the knocks on his door as he did so. 

It felt like he was going back to the life he’d had before meeting Kravitz and Angus, the steady old routine of a never changing work with the same customers coming and going all the time and no change in the routine. It hadn’t bothered him before, he was comfortable doing things the way he always had, because then there was no way for him to do it wrong. There were so many ways the situation with Kravitz could go wrong, to get fucked up that Taako didn’t want to consider them all (even if he did think them all over and over again when he couldn’t sleep). 

Now though, now his old routines were starting to become a problem. No matter how hard he worked and how much he cleaned the restaurant and did inventory and rearranged the back, _ he couldn’t stop thinking about Kravitz and Angus _ . 

It was a real problem. 

It was even more of a problem when they both showed up at the diner right after the evening rush had passed, carefully walking in and sitting in the corner booth furthest away from the windows as always. Taako had half a mind to tell one of his coworkers to take the order, but that would just be rude, and they hadn’t actually done anything wrong. It was just him, acting stupid.

At the table Kravitz was dressed in a dark suit jacket with a black dress shirt, and the circles under his eyes matched the clothes. He was running one hand over his scarred knuckles, eyes shifting around the room before they focused on Taako. He did not look well, and his breath seemed almost shallow. 

“Hi, what can I get you?” Taako carefully asked, pulling out pen and paper from his apron and taking note of the way Angus was avoiding looking at him by staring down at the table. He too was dressed up in a smart little suit and matching shorts. It would have been cute if the situation hadn’t been so tense. 

“Just a vegetarian taco plate for each of us please.” Kravitz said, with the fakest polite smile on his face Taako had ever seen. 

“Sure, you want anything to that? Coffee? Hot chocolate?” Taako smiled back, sure that he looked just as uncomfortable as Kravitz did. 

Kravitz shook his head. “No thank you, just water please.”

Taako blinked, pen lifting slightly from where he’d been scribbling down the order. “Are you really sure? I can whip some pancakes if y’all want no problem!” 

Something was up. This felt like a step back but Taako had no idea from what. He’d done a good job getting them both addicted to too sweet coffee and cheap chocolate, and they shouldn’t have stopped drinking it just because he hadn’t been around for a few days. And it wasn’t like Kravitz to order for Angus without asking him what he wanted beforehand. 

“Yes, that will be all.” Kravitz furrowed his brows and swallowed. “You don’t have to bring anything extra out either Taako, this will be sufficient.” 

Well. There went that plan. It stung a bit, if Taako had to be honest, having Kravitz acting so polite and cold towards him. “Okay… Well, I’ll be right out with your water I guess.” 

Ugh. The whole situation was too tense and awkward, and Taako felt even worse when he brought out the food and drinks, keeping his sentences short and neutral, carefully avoiding joking with them even if he wanted to. Both Kravitz and Angus were both acting unnatural, not talking to each other or doing anything more than focusing intently on their food. 

Taako stood behind the counter, half heartedly cutting up lemon slices to avoid nervously pacing around and bothering Kravitz and Angus when a pair of headlights pulled into the parking lot outside. He looked up when they hadn’t turned off after a few seconds, most normal people just parked their car and went inside, rarely did anyone stay seated with the headlights on no less. 

Finally, after what felt like a good few minutes the car turned off and the people walked inside. Taako all but rushed over to greet them, menus in hand and Waiter Smile™ plastered on. Anything to distract himself from the corner booth.

“Hello and welcome to Garfield’s Diner! Where would you like to sit?” He said, almost staring at the two newcomers. He’d never seen them before not at the restaurant or in town. Another pair of strangers stopping by late at night, how interesting. There was a man and a woman standing side by side, almost identical if it wasn’t for the different neon colors in their hair. Both of them were wearing a little colorful pin on their admittedly fashionable jackets and big grins on their faces. 

The man looked around, eyes scanning the restaurant before they landed on the table where Kravitz and Angus were sitting, his smile widened even more, and he nicked his head to the booth just behind them, green hair spilling over his shoulder. “We’ll take that seat if you don’t mind.”

“Sure.” Taako turned around and led them over, his smile dropping instantly from his face and got replaced by a frown. Something didn’t feel right. The newcomers high heels klicked agaisnt the tiled floors, and Taako saw how Kravitz stiffened in his seat the closer they got.

Making a split second decision, he led them two tables down from where Kraviz and Angus sat, and gestured for the guests to sit down. 

“Thought it would be a bit cozier here, it’s the best seat in the house!” He said, and winked. It absolutely wasn’t, but Taako was a good waiter and could come up with any bullshit lie on the spot. “I’ll let you two look over the menu for a moment and then I’ll be back to take your orders, kay?” 

He walked back towards the counter, but stopped when Kravitz called his name softly. He was just as stiff as earlier, head barely turned to look at Taako where he was standing at the edge of the table. “I-” He licked his lips. “I would like to pay now if that’s okay.”

“Yeah no problem? You’ve barely eaten anything though?” Taako gestured to the plates in front of them, and Angus ducked his head even more. He seemed on the verge of sliding out of his seat, head barely above the table and knee bouncing erratically. 

“We weren’t feeling that hungry. Sorry for the inconvenience.” His fist was clenched so hard he was shaking, and there was a wild desperate look in his eyes that Taako’d never seen before. Something was very wrong. 

“Dude believe me it’s really no problem. You do you ‘n all that jazz.” A moment passed. Kravitz stared forward and Taako cleared his throat. “Oh yeah the bill, I’ll bring it out like, right now.” 

He returned with the bill to the table, glancing towards the new guests who were leaning back in their seats. The woman caught his eye and grinned at him behind purple hair, eyelashes fluttering. Taako smiled back and tried to do his best to hide his discomfort. 

Kravtiz handed him a twenty, still barely looking at Taako. “I thought I should tell you now, we haven’t exactly seen you much this week so I just wanted…” He trailed off and shook his head, shoulders relaxing just barely. “We’re leaving. Tomorrow morning probably.”

“You are?” Taako wasn’t sure he’d heard right. He’d always known that it was going to happen, but for a moment he’d managed to trick himself into forgetting about it, and then there’d been other problems to focus on. Of course they weren’t going to stay forever, living in Lucretia’s spare room and grabbing coffee with Taako, but for a moment it had felt like that was how it always were going to be. Taako wanted more time to spend with them, or he wanted to start over the week since the conversation with Lucretia. It had been stupid of him to ignore them, when he knew there was an experation date to his time with Kravtiz and Angus. 

He just didn’t know he’d lose them so soon. 

“Yes. We’ve been here for too long. It’s time to go somewhere else.” Kravitz looked so small in his seat, and sad. Like the thought of them leaving hurt him as much as it hurt Taako. “I didn’t intend for us to stay this whole time, it was only going to be one night and while it’s been absolutely amazing we really need to move on.”

“ _ Oh _ .” His spine felt like the tundra. “Thanks for telling me I guess.”

“It’s the least I could do. You’ve been so kind to us Taako, really, it’s been so wonderful staying here because of you, I’m so sorry we can’t have more time.” And with that, he stood up and walked out of the restaurant. Angus followed after him, only stopping to give Taako a quick hug he was too frozen to return, before he too had left. 

For a moment he stood there, rooted on the spot, mind blank. 

Then he remembered the new guests. Taako closed his eyes, breathed in and plastered on his smile. He walked over to the table and pulled out his pen and paper, trying very hard to not look like he wanted to go into the backroom and cry. “Sorry for the wait, are you guys ready to order?”

“Oh we’ve changed our minds, suddenly we’re not that hungry anymore.” The woman said, grin razor sharp and long acrylic nails drumming on the table. “Have a nice evening dear, and maybe we’ll see each other some day.”

“I- okay?” God what was it with this evening and just being the worst? Taako stepped aside as they both rose and walked out, waving to him and laughing. 

Taako shook his head and cleaned the menus of the table and looked at the watch on the wall. His shift was almost over, so he slipped into the back room and took a very deep breath and tried not to cry. He failed.

He didn’t know for how long he stood there, biting his lip as hard as he could and trying to stop the tears from running down his cheeks, but it felt like ages. It wasn’t  _ fair  _ that Kraviz and Angus had to leave, or that Taako was being left behind again. He’d just gotten used to having them around, and now he was going back to how everything had been, with only a gaping hole where meetups during his shifts and coffee meetups used to be. God it would be like when Lup left all over again. Fuck that made him cry even harder. 

He almost missed the sound of his phone ringing, and he fumbled around for it in his pockets, and wiping his face at the same time. It was in his jacket pocket when he found it, and the caller was Lucretia, and he had a bunch of missed calls from her as well. Yikes. 

“Hi Lucretia. You know it’s late right?” He said, trying to sound normal. 

“Taako hi, I’ve been trying to call you for the past five minutes, there’s been a situation. Are you still at work, can you talk?”

“I just got off work, what’s up?” He pinned the phone between his ear and shoulder, uniting his apron as he spoke. 

“I don’t know how to say this but oh fuck it.” She paused for a moment, and Taako could hear her exhale. “Someone took Angus and shoved him into a car and drove off.” 

“What.” Taako’s heart felt frozen, his tears completely forgotten. The apron in his hands fell on the floor. “Are you joking? Is this your version of a shitty joke ‘cuz-”

“I’m not joking.” She interrupted. ”He’s gone, snatched, kidnapped, abducted, whatever you want to call it. I don’t know what exactly happened but one moment he was right outside my door and the next some man with green hair grabbed him and they were off. The police are on their way and I think you need to get over here as well. ”

“Right. Right right right I’ll be right there.” Fuck he could barely breathe. “How’s Kravitz doing?” God Taako could only imagine what must be going through his mind at the moment. The panic he must be feeling. 

Taako was already out the door, throwing himself onto his bike and skidding out of the parking lot as fast as possible. 

“I don’t know… He’s just sitting on my sofa. I tried talking to him but nothing. Maybe you’ll have better luck than me.”

“Maybe. Are you sure that the man had green hair? Was it like, ugly to the point where it almost looked cool but only almost?” Taako panted, trying to pick up speed with one hand on the handlebar and the other holding the phone. 

“Yes. How did you know that?” She sounded confused, if not a little suspicious as well.

“He was at the diner tonight, with his sister probably. They didn’t order anything, just left right after Kravitz and Angus,” He trailed off, “Fuck.”

“So it was planned.” She said, then lowered her voice and Taako could barely hear her over the blood pumping in his ears. “I think this has something to do with what we discussed last time. It feels too  _ off _ for it to have been a random kidnapping, it can’t have been a coincidence and if they are involved with a- a cult then it’s unlikely they would be allowed to escape without facing the consequences.” 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to the ones that commented that Taako should call Lup, it'll happen i promise!!! 
> 
> Sorry again for this but yknow :) I'm me so i can't write a story without hurting Angus a least a little 
> 
> Scream at me on[Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com)


	7. Newly formed plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise update! I was feeling motivational (and i didn't want to study)
> 
> Edit: Thank you so much for 100 kudos <3 and all the comments as well, y’all warm my heart

When Taako arrived at Lucretia’s house the police was already there, and he could see the neighbors standing on their porches in robes looking tired and confused. He didn’t have time to park his bike, he just threw it to the ground and went inside, pushing past one of the police dressed in uniform and making a beeline towards the living room where he knew Kravitz world be. 

And he was sitting there, on the sofa, staring straight ahead with an empty look in his eyes. There was another police officer next to him, standing with a clipboard in hand and trying to ask Kravitz questions, though he did not answer any of them. He sat quietly, back straight as a ruler and ignored everything around him. He was a statue of hidden grief.

Taako ached to reach out to him, but it felt like if he did, Kravitz would shatter under his touch. 

Instead he sat down next to him on the couch and left enough space between them to fit another person. Kravitz didn’t react, he kept staring at the wall so Taako did the same. In the reflection on the TV in front of them he could make out the shape of Kravitz and the street lights outside the window, their light cutting off around his silhouette and leaving a black void. Taako’s eyes flickered to the pictures hanging on the wall, there was an old picture of him, Lucretia and Lup standing next to each other during their high school graduation, wearing the red robes and grinning. He imagined how he would feel if she’d been ripped from his hands, taken right in front of his face while he was incapable of doing anything. Just thinking about it felt like getting punched in the stomach and having his heart being plunged in ice. Losing Lup would be the worst thing to ever happen to him, and Kravitz had experienced that.

It was only when the police officer seemed to give up trying to kontact Kravitz and walked past them that Taako snapped out of his thoughts. Shit he really needed to talk to him, or at least say something comforting and meaningful. His mouth was dry like the desert. Taako swallowed, opened and closed his mouth, worked his jaw for a bit and then prepared to say that he was sorry or how he’d be there if Kravitz needed him. “What a fuckfeast huh.” 

He slapped his hands over his mouth, eyes wide and horrified. 

Kravitz turned to him with surprise written all over his face. “What?” He choked out, and it almost sounded like a laugh.

If a hole could open up under the sofa and swallow him right now Taako would be eternally thankful. He cringed, and continued staring forward and hoped that Kravitz couldn’t see the blush he was feeling creeping up his neck. 

“I, uh, shit fuck. I was gonna say I’m so sorry and that if you want you can always talk to me and I’ll be here for you and all that stuff. But yeah didn’t exactly say that. T-b-h I don’t even know why I said that, it is a real fuckfeast but I. Fuck dude.” He took a deep breath. “I’m really,  _ really _ sorry.” 

“It’s not like you were the one that let him be grabbed and thrown into a car Taako, you don’t have to say you’re sorry.” Kraviz sighed. His whole body crumbled down, and he hid his face in the palm of his hands. “And you’re right, it really is a fuckfeast.” 

“Yeah but you didn’t decide that he was gonna get, um, kidnapped. It’s not your fault either you know that right?” Taako asked, and watched as Kravitz's shoulders sunk even lower.

“If we hadn’t gone here this wouldn’t have happened.” His voice came out slightly muffled. “I knew staying for so long would cause trouble, but it- it was  _ nice _ being here. We got to stay in an actual house and not some shitty motel and Lucretia let Angus borrow any book he wanted to read and he was so happy… and now it’s all ruined.”

Kravitz started to sob, body shaking with the force and Taako could see tears running down his wrist. Cautiously he moved closer, gently placed his hand on Kravitz’s shoulder and he could feel the tremors. He lowered his hands from his face and continued talking. “I haven’t seen him like this ever. We couldn’t stay in Felicity Wilds so I grabbed him and we got out, and it’s just. We were driving around for months before this, going to small obscure towns and staying for a few days before moving again. Then we came here and it was so good, it was peaceful. I really thought we could have stayed, but then we barely saw you for a week and I knew we’d overstayed our welcome, it was time to leave.” He took a shaky breath. ”I was hoping that we’d see you one last time though, but if we’d just left when I first thought about it this wouldn’t have happened.” 

“Kravitz, no, that’s not how that works. You can’t blame yourself for wanting to get out of what I assume is a pretty shitty place. It’s like, you’re not supposed to be worried that someone is following you all around the country, especially if the people following you have really awful hair colors.” It wasn’t even a joke but it got a weak chuckle out of Kravtiz anyways, and Taako felt just a tiny bit relieved.

“Yeah the twins fashion sense is questionable at best.” He said with just the tiniest of smiles on his lips. 

“So you know them,” Taako started to say and then bit his lip. Paused for a moment and then continued, “Do you know where they would take Angus?”

It was quiet for a moment, and then Kravitz nodded. “Back to Felicity Wilds. There’s a celebration of sorts that’s happening midnight on Tuesday. It was the reason we escaped.” 

“Well then we’ll get him back!” Taako exclaimed, and stood up from the sofa. 

“What? Taako what are you saying?” Kravitz questioned with brows furrowed. 

Yeah, what the fuck was he saying. But he couldn’t back out of it now. He had to help Kravitz  _ somehow _ . “We’ll go to Felicity Wilds, right now. You have a car right? We can take that, those fuckers can’t have gotten that much of a head start. We’ll snatch Angus right back from their hands, it’s gonna be like payback. Besides my sister goes to college there, I’m sure we can crash on her sofa.”

“I- are you serious?” Leaning forward, Kravitz looked at him with wide eyes. 

“Hell yes! Fuck, what else are we supposed to do? Don’t know about you but I’m not gonna leave Angus in the hands of some weird doomsday cult member with awful green hair!” Adrenaline was flaring up in his bones, this was it. This was the change that Taako had wished for, this was his ticket out of Moonville and this was a chance to get Angus back. He was sure he looked manic, but from the spark in Kravitz’s eyes he wasn’t the only one. 

“Okay. Okay! Yes we’ll go, right now. I just need to grab my bag.” Determined Kravitz stood up, and to Taako’s surprise, and hugged him. “Thank you Taako. This means the world to me.” 

Taako hugged him back, clinging to him and burrowing his face in Kravitz’s shirt. “Of course. We’ll get him back in no time at all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting close to the end!!! 
> 
> vibe with me on tumblr and all that on [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com), sometimes i post art!


	8. You are in a car with a beautiful boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had so much fun writing this chapter and I'm really proud of it!! Hope you all like it as well!!
> 
> warning tho: there will be mentions of the death of a child, nothing happens but if things like that makes you uncomfortable then skip a few lines from after Taako asks "Why did they take Angus?" and then ignore the part where he says "Well all of this is a real fuckfeast"  
I know i cover like, heavy topics or whatever but I don't want to ever actually cause people to feel bad, so ba careful and remember that this is all fiction and it's supposed to be fun :)
> 
> This chapter was brought to you by; Supercut by Lorde from her hit album Melodrama (2017)

It shouldn’t have taken Taako so long to figure out that going on a road trip to visit a cult with a man who was probably deeply traumatized and anxious wasn’t going to be a smooth ride. As it was, he was sitting shotgun and listening to some preacher on the radio loudly reading bible verse after bible verse. 

Kravitz was next to him, white knuckling the steering wheel and staring straight on at the road ahead of them. It was just a long line of gray illuminated by their headlights in between fields of dark dirt and the occasional darker shapes of dry bushes, now and again they’d meet another car in flashes of light in the otherwise monotone landscape, but that was all. The air in the car was suffocating, and Taako wanted to shift in his seat, but if he did the leather seat would make a noise and disturb the stale silence. 

This wasn’t how he had imagined getting out of Moonville to visit Lup for the first time would go. He’d expected  _ more.  _

The moon was shining down on the car, and Kravitz had rolled down the window a few minutes earlier and his long dark hair was swirling around him from the wind blowing inside and melting together with the night sky. It could have been a shot from an old movie, this young man driving down an empty road, his beauty and carefree youth a contrast to the unchangeable world outside, on his way to a better future where he could truly live. That was how Taako had imagined his escape would look like, with retro music playing on the radio and pink bubblegum in his mouth. 

Unfortunately the look in Kravitz eyes destroyed the whole picture, instead of bright eyes and an easy grin, he looked like he was on his way to his execution. His mouth was a thin line, jaw clenched and there was an emptiness in his eyes that made Taako a bit scared. This wasn’t a movie.

In the background the preacher continued to do his thing, and Taako oh so slowly sank further down in his seat, trying very hard to not disturb anything. The adrenaline from the earlier evening has long since faded away, and now all they were left with was  _ this.  _

The digital clock on the dashboard was the only light in the whole car, it’s glowing red light proclaiming 02:54. Taako was used to long nights at the restaurants, but then he at least could do things and wasn’t sitting down staring at a boring landscape the whole time. He felt tired, down to his bones. 

And that wasn’t fair now was it? Whatever Taako was going through couldn’t have been anything compared to what Angus was feeling in a car far ahead on the same road. Or what Kravitz was feeling, driving after them 20 miles over the speed limit and just trying to catch up. 

He felt empty, maybe. It wasn’t a nice feeling and the quiet in the car didn’t help. 

Taako sank down in his seat even more, and sighed under his breath. 

“You can go to sleep if you want.” Kravitz's voice startled him so much that he sat up straight in an instance. Taako turned to look at him, but Kravitz was still staring forward like he hadn’t changed anything, the only difference was that his grip on the steering wheel had loosened just the tiniest bit. 

“Oh uhm, nah that’s no problem. I’ve stayed up longer than this before.” He didn’t want to go to sleep and leave Kravitz alone to deal with his thoughts, even if that was essentially what he was already doing, it felt better if he was awake. 

“Angus-” Kravitz paused, coughed and continued, “Angus used to fall asleep all the time, or he’d be reading. I only managed to grab a few books for him when we left… Or I guess escaped would be a better word. Anyways, he would read one book and then start on the next one over and over again, soon he’d read them all so much that he’d start taking notes and marking out which parts were his favorites.” 

“Yeah I remember. He had that one book, it was like a purple cover and it was something with a bell I think?” Taako could recall the numerous occasions he’d seen Angus with the same book, highlighter pens and post-it notes on the table in front of him just waiting to be put to use. 

“Animus Bell.” Kravitz gave a dry chuckle. “It’s our version of the bible, Angus used to love to go through it and find the weirdest prophecies and see if they ever came through.”

“Oh, um. Like, okay you can tell me to shut up, but what sort of church did you go to? ‘Cause it doesn’t seem that great if you have to escape from it yknow.” Taako stared ahead, following the headlights with his eyes and almost holding his breath. He wanted to know the answer so badly, asking before had seemed wrong but currently it felt like it was now or never. 

Kravitz was quiet for a long time, and the panic had just begun to settle in Taako again when he spoke. “It’s. It isn’t a good place. Taako, I just need you to understand that I didn’t know better before I got out of there. I’ve been part of Wonderland Churches my whole life, I should have realized everything was wrong much earlier than I did. If I had, maybe we wouldn’t be here.” He paused and took a deep breath. “It’s a cult. And it’s a really bad one at that, my- the leaders believe that if they don’t offer a sacrifice the world will end.”

“And when you say sacrifice...” Taako trailed off, letting the sentence hang in the air. Lucretia had told him that they practiced human sacrifice, but that seemed so outlandish, something taken straight from the 80’s satanic panic era.

“It could be anything, most of it was about money; have people sacrifice all their saving to Wonderland so it would protect them. The more you give to the church the deeper in you get, and then you have to give up even more. I think I’ve been told that the world would end so many times I can’t even count them, but thanks to the  _ gracious sacrifices of the wonderful community we’ve survived once again. _ ” Kravitz sighed, hands working over the steering wheel and for a moment his eyes shifted to look at Taako. 

“So… It’s a tax scam?” That was not as bad as he had expected, and it wasn’t something he’d heard before, maybe Lucretia had gotten it wrong, or confused it with Jonestown. 

“Partly. On the entry levels it’s all about money, but the further along you go the worse it gets. I’ve seen people give away their houses, promise to give their child to the church and I’ve seen people so broken down and afraid of the end of the world that they’re willing to do  _ anything _ . Wonderland takes advantage of anyone it can get its hands on.” The more Kravitz talked the less rigid he became, shoulders relaxing and jaw unclenching. 

Taako was quiet, and stared out the window at the endless road ahead of them. It was daunting, to know that at the end of the ride he would be going to that place and meet all the people who were trapped by Wonderland, to know that Lup was in the same town as the church. “Uh, when did you get out?” 

“About three months before me and Angus arrived at Moonville.” Kravitz paused, and worked his jaw for a moment. “I woke him up in the middle of the night and we just ran. Wonderland never sleeps, and there’s always someone watching your every move so I couldn’t afford to make a detailed plan, if the twins had found out about I’d be so tightly locked up that I never saw the light of day again. I had gone out the day before to buy backpacks for us so we could have something to carry clothes in but that was it. When we got out I picked a direction and just kept going, going from one small unknown town to the next.”

“The twins?” Taako asked, but he had an inkling of who they were.

“You’ve met them. Edward and Lydia, they were at the diner. They're the new leaders of the church and, well, it probably hasn’t ever been a good place but it definitely became hell when they took over… For your sake Taako, I hope you never get to meet them ever again.” 

They sat in silence, on the radio there was a new preacher talking, ending every sentence with  _ Amen!  _ before he continued on. Leaning against the window, Taako looked out and could faintly make out the stars above them, almost drowned out by the dark sky. In the far distance he could make out some dark clouds floating above the faint horizon line. 

If Taako had run from all that he’d ever known he wondered if he’d ever stop. He didn’t know if he would have had the courage to sit in a car next to someone and just spill his guts. Kravitz probably wouldn’t have done it either if it wasn't for Angus getting taken, by now they’d both probably be asleep, waiting for the following day when they were leaving to go on to hide in the next unknown town that was just a dot on a map. 

Suddenly, Taako felt so sad for Kravitz. There was no stopping in his future, just the same constant road with no goal at the end, no place to settle down at and to call home that felt familiar. He just had to go on, constantly looking over his shoulder. The only reason he was returning back was because he was forced to.

“Why did they take Angus?” His voice was soft and left a mist on the glass in front of him.

“Sometimes, when the end of everything is truly near, and all the money and valuables we had given up weren’t enough to save us, the leaders will say that the universe demands someone’s total devotion to Wonderland. A last sacrifice to save us all.” Kravitz didn’t say anything more, just stared straight ahead and kept driving, speeding up the car even more. 

A last sacrifice. 

Lucretia telling him about how it was a doomsday cult, demanding human sacrifices. 

“They’re going to kill him?” Taako sat up abruptly, leaning over so he could grab onto Kravitz’s arm hard. “Your weird ass fucking cult is going to kill an actual child for some fake last day bullshit that isn’t even real!” 

Kravitz turned to look at him properly, the first time since they’ve gotten into the car together. There was something wild in his eyes, a desperation and fear that Taako had seen many times before, but it shocked him just the same, the intensity of Kravitz pain. “You think I don’t know that Taako? I  _ lived  _ there, that was my whole life! It’s so fucked up! All of it! I used to go around and wonder when the next time would come and that if I was lucky I’d get chosen to be the one that saved us all, because it’s seen as an  _ honor  _ to give your life to the universe; your final act of devotion.” 

“Yes, but- I, um. It’s just.” Taako sighed, and loosened his grip on Kravitz a bit, but still kept his hand on his arm. “Fuck dude.”

Kravitz chuckled, sounding tired down to his bones. “Yeah, you don’t have to respond. It’s not exactly a normal situation or whatever.” 

“All of this is a real fuckfeast huh. So, will they sacrifice him as soon as we get there?” He didn’t want to ask if it was too late, if by the time they arrived they’d find Angus' body propped up on an altar with dead eyes staring ahead. 

“No, doom day will be on Tuesday at midnight, we’ll have gotten him out before then. I know where they will keep him, the only problem is getting there without being seen. I was, uhm how to say this-” Drumming his finger on the steering wheel, Kravitz bit his lip. “I was pretty high up ranking wise in Wonderland, if there’s anyone from there walking the streets they’ll know it’s me and report back.” 

Well, that was better than Taako expected. They had a little less than 48 hours to save Angus, and they weren’t going in there blind. Sure, based on how Kravitz earlier planning skills had been they were probably gonna do some breaking and entering, quick in and quicker out, but it was  _ something _ . Something almost like hope. 

He grinned at Kravitz, who hesitantly returned it. “Oh don’t worry about that, I know someplace where we can stay.” 

He twisted around in the chair and reached for his jacket in the back and snagged his phone from one of the pockets. The clock on the screen showed that it was well past three in the morning but Taako didn’t hesitate to dial the most important number in his phone. 

He pressed the phone to his ear and waited as the dialtones passed. After an uncomfortable amount of time she finally picked up, and he could hear the sleep in her voice. “Taako? It’s like, in the middle of the night. Why are you calling?” 

“Hi Lup, so uh, fun news! I’ll be in Felicity Wilds in a few hours, do you still have that ugly pullout couch you’re always talking about?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Expect maybe more updates from now on?? My university shuts down like tomorrow but i have my first big uni test in 2 weeks that i have to study for so who knows
> 
> My Tumblr is [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com) and sometimes i post art, poetry collections or make weird aesthetics
> 
> fun fact, if you're into poetry you might recognize the chapter title from the poem   
[You Are Jeff](http://youngerpoets.yupnet.org/2008/04/17/you-are-jeff-crush-by-richard-siken/) by Richard Silken... now if i were you i might go and look up the last part of the poem, part 24, and imagine that what he is describing is Exactly what Kravitz is feeling ;)


	9. 4 AM

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, i hope all of you and your families are safe, I'm very anxious about what's happening, but i hope you all are dealing with what's going on much better than me! So far i've had like 2 panic attacks over this and writing is one of the ways i distract myself with but even so! Yikes!
> 
> I tried my best with this chapter and i hope it's okay, i re-wrote it a bunch of times and im still not happy but alas here we are
> 
> I intentionally left out a lot descriptive details of how Lup and Barry looks, so it gives more room for you to imagine them as you like!!

By the time Kravitz parked in front of Lup’s apartment building the sun had risen over the horizon, casting a pale orange light over the streets. 

Taako had never seen where Lup lived with his own eyes, when she moved there she’d sent pictures and showed him the inside over facetime, but it wasn’t the same. He was here for the first time ever, and it felt daunting. 

Sleep was clinging to him like a heavy coat as he looked up at the tall gray building. Since Lup went off to college and took the car with her it had always been her who went back to Moonville to visit Taako, never the other way around. It was yet another thing that had reminded him of how trapped and alone he had been in their hometown, stuck in the same place in life while Lup was moving forward. Moving away from him.

During sleepless nights Taako had imagined how it would be like to show up unannounced at her doorstep, how he’d ask Lucretia for a ride to the nearest bus station so he could buy a ticket to Felicity Wilds and go there, with only his backpack and wallet. It hadn’t happened of course, Lup was so busy with her new life that Taako had started to worry that he would just interrupt her and get in the way of everything. The feeling hadn’t gone away, it had just grown more and more until he was sure that was the truth.

But here he was, meeting Lup due to the weirdest circumstances ever. 

He could hear Kravitz closing the door behind him and locking the car, and then he walked up beside where Taako was standing on the sidewalk. Against the early morning Kravitz looked like a leftover piece of night the light forgot to chase away, dressed completely in black and with shining eyes. 

“I’ve walked down this street so many times.” Kravitz said, looking at the apartments and cars lining the road. “Whenever I got too overwhelmed with the church I’d make some stupid excuse and just walk all over the town. Towards the end before I uh, escaped it wasn’t allowed. Couldn’t have anyone getting caught in the end of the world obviously.” He rolled his eyes and smiled gently at Taako. “Do you want to go inside.”

“Yeah! Yeah um, just give me a moment?” Taako didn’t know what he was waiting for, but it felt like if he walked through the door and got to see Lup in her new home it would solidify  _ something.  _ And that something didn’t feel great. 

Kravitz hummed in response. “Does it feel weird to be here?”

“Super weird dude. I never really thought I’d get to see this place yknow? Haven’t really had the option for a weekend visit.” Taako chuckled a bit, trying to hide the fact that his heart was beating so hard in his chest. 

“For some reason I don’t think your sister will mind you swinging by, even during these circumstances.” Kravitz said gently, placing his hand on Taako’s elbow. 

“Yeah.” Taako sighed. He didn’t know how he could describe the feeling for Kravitz, the hesitation right before the big step. Even if he knew it was okay and that Lup wouldn’t mind him stopping by, there was a part of him ruled only by feelings that doubted that knowledge. But even so, he had to meet her. “Okay let’s do this. Fuck.” 

Kravitz laughed and stepped forward, arm guiding Taako to the door and opening it for both of them to step inside.

The building didn’t have an elevator, just a staircase so old that the stone was worn down and the wallpaper was an ugly yellow with faded blue flowers in a neat line where it met the ceiling. There was a window for every floor they went up, Taako following behind Kravitz and checking each door on the floors for a plate with Lup’s name on it. Because as much as Taako knew about where she lived, he had no idea about which floor she actually was at. They stopped on the fifth, where Lup’s name was printed neatly on the little plaque on the door right under the peephole. 

Another name was written next to hers as well. 

Taako raised an eyebrow. Now wasn’t that interesting? 

He knew who  _ Barold J. Bluejeans  _ was, he’d spent a good couple of months getting texts and listening to Lup complain about him and how cute  _ Barry _ was and how he just didn’t seem to notice that she was into him! It had been fun the first three months, and then the last month it had just been plain torture- something he’d told Lup repeatedly in an effort to stop her talking. It hadn’t worked. 

He even knew what Barry looked like from countless instagram photos, but he’d never met him. Taako cringed for a moment, this was not how he wanted the first meeting to go. He’d wanted to impress Barry, and maybe intimidate him a bit just to get some respect or whatever. Besides, it wasn’t any fun with Lup getting a boyfriend if Taako wasn’t allowed to mess with him a little.

“Is this the right place?” Kravitz asked. 

Taako nodded and opened his mouth to answer but got interrupted by a jawn that he hurriedly covered with his hands. He blinked hard a few times and shook his face. “Oh God sorry, I think I’m uh, just a teeny tiny bit tired.” 

“It’s okay, you stayed awake the whole car ride.” His hand briefly lingered on Taako’s shoulder as he leaned forward to knock on the door three times. 

For a moment, it was all silent. 

Taako could hear the sound of movement behind the door, and his heart sped up and he could hear his pulse rushing in his ears. The lock turned. There was a moment of hesitation before the door opened and there she was. 

The last time he’d seen her, Lup’s had been dyed a bright red with a jacket to match as she waved goodbye to him and got into the car, ready to drive back to Felicity Wilds from Moonville. She’d been smiling, and she had kept waving when she drove down the road and turned a corner and disappeared from sight. 

Now, standing in front of him dressed in an old sweater and pyjama pants, Lup looked just the same as then. Her hair had grown out and he could see her roots showing clear as day, bur she was still smiling at him. 

Taako stood in the doorway, frozen, until he felt Kravitz give him a little push forward, and then he was inside the door, his arms wrapped around Lup like he was trying to hug the life out of her. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, so he did an ugly combination of both. 

“Wow, okay hi Taako!” She laughed, and it was such a wonderful sound. “I’ve missed you too nerd!”

He hugged her tighter to the point where he was sure it was uncomfortable for her but he didn’t care. If there was one thing in life he was allowed to be selfish about it was Lup’s hugs. 

“Not that I don’t enjoy this but uh, it is four in the morning.” She continued, still hugging him. “How about we go inside an’ I can fix up some breakfast for us.” 

“Mh, yeah sure.” Reluctantly he pulled away, taking barely a step back. He didn’t want to be too far away from Lup, it was just so comforting being close to her after all this time. He'd missed her so much. “Didn’t realize how Late? Or early I guess? It was.”

Lup raised her eyebrows at him, looking very sceptical. “Yeah you kinda woke me up in the middle of the night, and I really  _ really  _ love that you’re here, but what the fuck Taako?”

She stepped back and Taako realized that he was in Lup’s home for the first time ever. Right by the door was a chair piled with jackets, and under a worn old jean jacket was the red one that Lup always wore when she visited him. Further down he could see the kitchen, and a window covered by a heavy curtain except for a sliver of sunlight that was glowing on the floor. There were posters pinned up on the walls and the old rug that she’d brought with her from Moonville on the ground. It looked like a  _ home.  _

“I could really do with a coffee right now.” He said instead of answering her question. 

Taako turned around and caught sight of himself in the hallway mirror in the dim light of the apartment and winced. God he looked like a mess, there were dark bags under his eyes and his hair was dirty and falling all over the place. He was still in the same clothes he’d worn as he’d left work what felt like ages ago. 

He looked over at Kravitz and realized that he looked exactly as worn out as Taako looked and felt. His shoulders were slumped down and he seemed dangerously close to falling over on the spot. Still he was looking around the apartment and didn’t pay any mind to his fatigue. 

“Yeah no shit, you look like a wreck.” She snorted and began walking down the hall but stopped and turned around with narrowed eyes directed at Kravitz. “Do I know you from somewhere?”

“I don’t think so?” Kravitz looked very alarmed, and Taako could see him fiddling with his hands, running his fingers over his scarred knuckles over and over. 

Lup shrugged. “Guess you got one of those faces, dude. What’s your name? Because Taako told me he’d bring a guest but I wasn’t really expecting,” She gestured towards him, “I was more thinking like Lucretia or something.” 

“Oh uh, Kravitz. Kravitz McDonald.” It sounded almost like a question and Taako glanced at Kravitz in the mirror, but Kravitz didn’t meet his eyes. 

They followed Lup into the apartment which turned out to be only one big room. There was a bed pushed to the wall with unmade sheets, a stack of books on the ground next to a sofa and a small table for two beside the window where a brown haired guy was furiously typing away on a laptop. The glow from the screen illuminated his face and reflected in his glasses, and next to him on the table was a stack of worn books spread out with highlighted text and notes scribbled in the margins. 

“Babe this is Taako yknow my brother, and Kravitz who’s his groupie I guess.” Lup said, and reached for the coffee filters. “Taako, Kravitz, this is Barry. Sorry we didn’t have time to clean up but that’s what you get when you call at two in the morning.” She didn’t sound particularly sorry. 

“It’s good to finally meet you.” Barry said, and stood up to fully greet them. And now, Taako’s not an expert on what people wore when they were up studying during sunrise, but he suspected that in most cases, it wasn’t Levi’s jeans. 

“Dude, no offence but I always thought that Lup was joking when she told me your name was Bluejeans but fuck, you really took that name and went running with it-” Apparently Taako’s mouth was running with him as well, and he cut himself off with a yawn.

“Um-” Barry started to speak, but Kravitz cut him off by waving him off. 

“So sorry about that, Taako’s been awake the whole ride here. I’m Kravitz, it’s nice to meet you too. Thank you so much for letting us drop by on such a short notice.” He gave a brilliant smile and Taako was a bit taken aback by how cheerful he looked. Right then it didn’t look like Kravitz was back in his hometown to save his brother from a murderous cult. 

“It’s no problem!” Barry gave an awkward chuckle. “Just a quick question; do I know you from somewhere?” 

“No? I don’t think you do?” Kravitz said, shaking his head. 

“Dude I said the same thing!” Lup called over her shoulder. 

“I guess I got one of those faces.” Kravitz paused and shrugged. Taako could feel his arm move next to his. “Are you okay Taako?”

He hadn’t even realized that he was almost leaning on Kravitz for support, looking around the room with heavy eyelids, and the dark room didn’t make it better. He stifled a yawn, “Oh ‘m peachy, just a bit tired that’s all.” 

“Why don’t you take the bed and sleep for a bit Taako.” He almost jumped when Lup’s voice came from beside him, and he nodded in response, head as heavy as lead.

“You’ve been up for almost 24 hours. I’ll explain the whole thing to your sister okay, I think you need this.” Kravitz placed an arm around his shoulders and led him over to the bed. As soon as he sat down it was like all the adrenaline he’d felt for meeting Lup ran out of his body, leaving only the aching and tired shell left.

Still, even if his brain felt like it hurt with each thought he didn’t let go of Kravitz's arm. “But what about you?” Because despite everything he knew that Kravitz would make sure that everyone else was taken care of before himself. “Who’s gonna take care of you?”

Kravitz laughed light and airy, and sat down beside him on the mattress as Taako leaned back and placed his head on the pillow. It was completely different from how Lup had laughed earlier but it sounded just as wonderful. He closed his eyes and felt Kravitz's place the blanket over him. “Don’t worry about it, you’re doing a pretty good job.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> say hi to me on tumblr a href="https://newspapernom.tumblr.com" rel="nofollow">Newspapernom ! I sometimes post art but mostly i just reblog things about poetry 
> 
> The chapter is named after the song 4 AM by bastille on the album Doom Days which is also the inspiration to this fic!!
> 
> and i'm a little proud of the reference to uhh chapter 6 maybe?? i am a Firm believer in that Kravitz needs some love and support too!!


	10. Sunlight/Best Laid Plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, in these trying times enjoy an extra long chapter <3 
> 
> i've been listening to vaporwave and lorde remixes on youtube Exclusively when writing this so thats the vibe of this chapter
> 
> ((also i might, potentially be working on a new fic so ;) keep your eyes open))

Taako woke up to the sound of soft music playing and the feeling of being buried under a ton of covers.

His whole body was weighed down, and even the motion of opening his eyelids seemed impossible. If he could he’d just stay where he was, stuck in limbo between asleep and awake, enveloped in the warmth of the bed, Taako was pretty sure he would be set for life. 

It felt so  _ comfortable  _ in the bed, where he could breathe slow and heavy and not think about anything, just focus on how safe he was. How there was nothing else but the covers surrounding him and that he was back near Lup like when they were younger. He was back to how it used to be, before she had moved away and he’d been left in a town he just wanted to leave.

Here he was though, outside of that town, reunited with Lup. In his chest, he could feel his heart beating on slowly, echoing in his ears and the tips of his fingers. Just as slow and steady as his heartbeat was his thoughts. There was something that Taako knew he should be thinking about, a reason why he was with Lup again. 

Despite himself, he felt his eyebrows twitch, a slight movement, but enough to make him a little more aware. He was with Lup he knew that much, he knew that she still looked the same as she had when she left, but this was the first time he’d seen her new home. Because it was her new home, and Taako was a guest. But getting to Lup required a car, and he didn’t have one so how had he- 

_ Kravitz.  _ And Agnus. Oh fuck Angus. 

He shot up, the covers falling off him as he sat straight, trying to blink away the dark spots in front of his eyes. The warmth of the covers left quickly, being replaced by the cold of the room, and he could barely see straight ahead, vision swimming and making it impossible to focus on anything. His eyelids still felt heavy as rocks and he tried so, so hard to keep them up but they kept fluttering shut. 

Despite this, his heart, previously so slow, was a sledgehammer in his chest. 

Placing one hand beside himself on the mattress to stabilize himself, Taako used the other to look around Lup’s apartment. The sun shone brightly through the windows, illuminating the whole room and causing the papers on the small kitchen table to glow white. On the floor next to the bed was a glass of clear water that reflected sunspots on the beige wall and worn wooden floor. The digital clock on the microwave on the counter next to the kitchen sink told him in glowing red numbers that it was right after lunch. 

On the sofa that was just a little bit too small for him, was Kravitz. He was sitting sideways, with his legs over both of the cushions, his back towards Taako. In his hands were a book, and Taako watched as he slowly turned a page, sighed a little and rested the side of his face against the soft backrest of the sofa. He was still dressed in the same clothes he’d had earlier that morning, black shirt rumpled and his hair was pulled up in a red scrunchie. Probably borrowed from Lup, since Taako knew that Kravitz absolutely didn’t own anything remotely close to that.

Kravitz didn’t seem to have noticed that he was awake, and Taako took a moment to just watch him in the sunlight. The way his long fingers with their bruised knuckles and worn skin delicately handled the book, the slow rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, completely consumed by what he was reading. 

But even laying on the sofa, Taako could see the tense line of his shoulders, the way his foot was tapping an eratting rhythm on the arm rest. It occured to Taako then, that since the last meeting before Angus disappeared, he couldn’t remember a time when Kravitz had been relaxed. 

There had been a moment, right before Lucretia had told him about Wonderland, where Kravitz had been truly carefree Taako assumed, or maybe he’d just relaxed a bit, settled down for a moment and realized that he was safe and had a friend in one of the most boring towns ever. Despite how much Taako hated the place, it had been bearable once Kravitz and Angus were there, he’d had someone to talk to and have fun with in a way he hadn’t had since Lup left. 

Now it was like watching Kravitz revert back to his old self, to the man that stepped into the diner at 3am on a rainy Tuesday morning with a shy kid behind him who’d never even tried hot chocolate. 

Would it have changed anything if Taako hadn’t called Lucretia to find them a place to stay? Kravitz had said that the reason they stayed longer was because of him so had he inevitably caused Angus to be back with the cult? Taako didn’t know. And he felt so bad, so guilty over the fact that in the deepest corner of his heart, he was a bit grateful, because he’d gotten to see Lup again. 

As much as he had felt apprehensive about seeing her, the fact that he was here, in her apartment that smelled faintly of the same meals she used to make, and with her old red jacket- it felt like home. Not because Taako had been here before, but because this was where Lup lived and felt comfortable, and it was the place where Kravitz was as well. 

In his newly awakened and dazed state, Kravitz looked ethereal in the light. Once again Taako got the feeling that captured in this moment, Kravitz could be the epitome of youth, if only it wasn’t for the strained way he was holding himself. The yearning to reach out to him and touch him caught Taako by surprise, the moment was fragile, and if he moved even the slightest bit more, he would break it. 

Time passed, and he was content with just sitting there on the bed, slowly letting his body and mind relax and just  _ take in  _ Kravitz. More and more, he felt his heartbeat slow down to the comfortable rhythm, and his eyelids grew heavy again, and it wasn’t long before he got caught by sleep again. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


The next time he woke up, it was caused by Lup shaking his shoulders a mere ten seconds before slamming a pillow down on his head.

“Lunch is ready, if you ever feel like waking up.” She said, and stuck her tongue out to Taako when he cursed at her.

“Yeah just not a cool way to wake me up at all. You get like, negative cool points for stuffing a pillow on my face.” He muttered, and reluctantly swung his legs over the side of the bed, yawning. 

“It woke you up didn’it? Think that actually gives me like extra cool points.” She paused, and ran a hand through her hair, “Anyways, you’ve been dead to the world for uh, super duper long, and from what your friend told us we don’t really have that much time to get this freakin mess sorted out.”

“Mh?” Taako looked at her and pretended like he didn’t have to yawn again. On the counter behind her, Taako could see four bowls lined up filled with pasta and tomato sauce. 

“Yeah honestly I’m just, holy fuck you really got yourself into a twist and tango huh?” Lup was smiling at him, almost bordering on a smirk. “I’m not surprised but couldn’t you have chosen to go on a roadtrip to California and not to the, apparently, local death cult? 

Shrugging, Taako tried to look as nonchalant as possible. “Go big or go home dude. Can’t live life if it’s not on the edge yknow.”

“Uhuh, totes.” Dragging out the word, Lup walked back to the stove and picked up one of the bowls and handed it to Taako. “And I’m sure it got nothin to do with-” She nicked her head to the side where Kravitz was still on the sofa. 

Instead of reading, he was sitting with his hands resting between his knees and talking to Barry, and Taako could hear the exhaustion in his voice. It was just a bit deeper, long pauses after every sentence and almost hoarse. Strands of his hair were falling out of his bun, framing his face in wide sweeping curls, almost invisible in the sunlight. 

Taako narrowed his eyes at Lup. “Didn’t know they made you stupider in college. You barely had any brain cells before but now?  _ Ohh boy. _ ” 

Lup waved her hand in his face before sitting down at the chair at the small table opposite Barry. With one hand she pushed the books and papers to the side to make a little space for herself, and Taako felt  _ something _ in his chest. It was sadness, almost. It wasn’t anything new, he’d seen her do that a thousand times back in Moonville, and he knew that she’d been away at college for over a year, it was to be expected that she acted as she would at home in this apartment. Because this was her new home. 

As soon as Lup was seated, Barry turned his body towards her and gave her a sweet smile, and it made her laugh just a bit, happy and real. 

He moved to sit down on the edge of the bed he just vacated, but from the sofa, Kravitz shot him a look with his eyebrows furrowed and mouth half twisted up in a smile, and moved to the side, leaving a spot empty for Taako. 

The sofa sunk down under him like it was made of sponges, and Taako could feel a spring sticking up under his thigh. He grimaced. 

Kravitz, upon seeing his face, grinned at him. “It’s not the most comfortable thing in the world, isn’t it?”

“I might as well be better off sitting on the floor dude, after being in a car for seven hours and now this? It’s fucking over for my body.” He huffed and shoved a forkful of spaghetti into his mouth. “‘Nyways, what were you reading earlier?”

“Oh. Um, Harry Potter?” He pressed his knees close together, trapping his hands and his eyes shifted away from Taako’s face. “I’ve never read that book? Book series? Wonderland wasn’t that big on letting people read outside Literature. It’s good, I just think I’m a bit too old now to get into it.” 

Frowning, Taako tried to catch his eyes but failed. He hadn’t realized that there were things that he deemed universal that Kravitz had missed out on. What else hadn’t he known about when he was in the cult? It was no wonder he let Angus try everything he wanted and encouraged him to make his own decisions.

“Speaking off, how’re we gonna do this?” Lup said from the table, pointing her fork at Kravitz and narrowly avoiding having a drop of tomato sauce fall to the table. “Like I’m all down with taking down a cult, but like, this is one of those things you don’t wanna improvise. Feels like it could go uh, majorly fucking wrong yknow.”

“You really don’t have to-” Kravitz protested, only to be cut off by Barry who cleared his throat.

“Your um, church is really annoying, sorry to say it but I get at least five flyers handed to me each week on campus about your little recruitment team. And the parade you put on once a year isn’t nearly as fun as you think it is. I think we’d be doing everyone a favor actually.” He reached up to adjust his glasses, like he was a bit embarrassed by his proclamation.

“Yeah right! It’s so annoying!” Lup agreed. “Wait, is that where I know you from? Have you been like, giving me flyers for the past year and I just haven’t noticed?”

Kravitz shook his head, but he was smiling just a bit. “No it’s, how do I put this, a little bit below my rank? I wasn’t super high up on the hierarchy but at least I didn’t have to hand out flyers.” 

“Maybe the parade then?” Berry said, and Taako raised an eyebrow at him. “Yeah sorry Taako you wouldn't know about it, and I mean it’s nothing too exciting? Just a bunch of people in really awful neon clothes walking down the streets and playing music and handing out discount coupons for the sessions they hold at the church. Well, cult. And it’s all for the three leaders to be able to show off.”

“It’s really, really bad.” Kravitz's shoulders slumped and he scratched his neck with one hand. “All of the members have to prepare everything for ages outside of their normal chores and it’s all paid with ‘donations’,” he turned bitter on the word, “But it’s just manipulation. The day after the parade is the only time we’re ever allowed to sleep more than five hours.”

“Fucking fuck  _ what _ ?” Taako stared at him. “You’re not even allowed to fucking sleep? Jesus christ that’s way messed up.” 

“It’s very easy to control people if they’re a little bit sleep deprived all the time. And if you give them enough things to do during the day, most people don’t even know what’s happening until it’s too late and then you’re too far involved.” 

“Dude, this settles it then, we’re gonna bring your boy Angus home and hopefully cause the downfall of the cult.” Lup slammed her hands down on the table, startling Taako, and causing the bowl to rattle and the bookstacks to almost fall over. “So, let’s make a plan. Barry, babe could you please get me my notebook? I think it’s in my bag.” 

He nodded and went to retrieve it, and Lup shoved even more books away from the table to make space, and placed her bowl on the top of one big uneven stack of textbooks and papers like a crown ornament. “Right okay, Kravman you’re the lead here.” 

She handed him a pen, and Barry came back with a beaten up spiral notebook and placed it open on the table. Taako stood up and walked over to stand beside the table, biting his lip and almost feeling his hands shake. This was how they were going to save Angus. 

Kravitz closed his eyes and exhaled once. When he opened them, there was a gleam in his eyes that Taako hadn’t even known he'd missed. He looked more alive somehow, and it was incredible.

He grabbed the pen from Lup and drew a quick sketch on the paper of a floor plan with one long hallway with two rooms lining each side and a final giant room at the end of it. “This is the bottom floor plan for the private church facility, we’re going to have to go in the backway, because the members guarding the doors and inside will definitely know that you’re not with the church and I’m sure there’s been a widespread message of me being labeled as a suppressive person, and then they’ll report back to the twins immediately.” 

He circled one of the rooms to the left of the corridor, and Taako could see every scar on the back of his knuckles in the sunlight. “This room is labeled, uh storage unit or something like that. But there’s a set of stairs that lead to the basement, and it’s got the exact same floor plan and this-” he circled the big room at the end of the hallway, “This is where they will keep Angus. It’s the room of sacrifice.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh i hope i made Lup justice!! 
> 
> We're getting close to the end now!! ahhh to think that i had planned this to only be like 6 chapters in the beginning 
> 
> find me on Tumblr at [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com)


	11. Wonderland

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU ALL TO READ THIS HOLY FUCK  
I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS CHAPTER FOR SO LONG!!!!
> 
> its almost 4k words I hope that's not too long!!!! I had so much fun wring this oh my god y'all

From the outside Wonderland looked like it once could have been an old theatre. 

There was a staircase leading up to the heavy double doors that were propped open with twin signs hanging of them proclaiming ‘Welcome!’ in big golden letters against a deep purple background. The old stone pillars carrying the grand balcony on the second floor over the entrance had been painted an almost blinding green in between white stripes. Around the arches over the windows bright pink swirls were drawn, looking hypnotic and intriguing. 

If there was an equivalent to animals warning predators that they were poisonous with their bright colors in architecture Wonderland was it. The railing of the balcony had a big neon sign with WONDERLAND written in cursive, surrounded by small bursts of fireworks, and it was on even in the daylight, the text changing color every now and then with the fireworks doing the same. There were people milling around outside the building, dressed in color matching clothes with flyers in their hands or walking in and out of the open doors, seemingly all happy and going on about their day. 

Banners hung from different places on the building with the text ‘Do you want to know your destiny?’ in the same font as the neon sign. It could have been a modern version of the witch’s gingerbread house, a bright beacon for people who are desperate and need a place to go, not knowing what hides inside it’s walls. 

From behind the car window, Taako couldn’t help but admire the building in some weird, fascinating way. Because despite everything he’d heard, it looked  _ wonderful.  _ Like the whole building really held the answer to his destiny. “Hey so are we just gonna park on the curb and stroll in?” 

“No, if we go inside the whole place will be on lockdown in an instant.” Kravitz answered. He was sitting beside Taako in the backseat, one of Lup’s gray sweatshirts on with the hood pulled up paired with a pair of purple framed sunglasses. He looked uncomfortable in his incognito outfit, but they had unanimously deemed it was a necessary evil. “You wouldn’t know but there’s a whole group of people assigned to make sure that nobody that’s deemed a risky or suppressive person enters the building, especially during this time. Rituals always bring out the worst in us- them.” 

“Righto.” Taako ignored the slip up. It wasn’t like he was gonna call Kravitz out on it, he looked enough on edge already. “So how do we get in?” 

“We’re going to the backside of the church, it’s the one entrace that doesn’t have cameras, it’s mostly so all the workers who take smoke breaks can’t be called out on it. I- we weren’t allowed to have anything stronger than herbal tea.” Kravitz kinda sighed, and reached under the sunglasses to rub his eyes. “Sorry. I don’t mean to, I don’t know, dump all the fucked up shit that goes on in there on you. It’s just- it’s not great to be back here.” 

“Hey dude,” Lup said from the driver's seat, as she turned the steering wheel and drove down one of the smaller side streets by the building, which Taako now could see stretched down the whole way to the next intersection, it was massive. “It’s okay, hell I’d be more worried if you were taking this whole thing super well. So just babble on if that’s what you want!”

Nodding, he once again shifted his gaze back to Kravitz. It wasn’t easy to hear all the things Kravitz told them, but it put things into perspective, filled in gaps he didn’t even know were missing. 

It made him look at Kravitz in a new light, but it didn’t change who he was. In the end it was still Kravitz who’d decided to trust Taako in the middle of the night in a shitty diner and then stuck around because… Because they were friends. 

Taako wasn’t going to try to read anything into Kravitz's actions. Especially since there was no reason for him to do so. If there was, it would be the most inopportune time ever to realize that he was what? Interested in Kravitz? No, not happening. 

Yeah sure, Kravitz was kind and obviously cared about him, and probably trusted him a great deal seeing as he’d let Taako follow him back to Felicity Wilds to get Angus back. So what did it matter that whenever Taako looked at him he just wanted to make sure that Kravitz got the world served on a silver platter with no hardships? Or that Taako was a waiter so he would know exactly how to serve that platter? Clearly Kravtz deserved to be taken care of after all that he’d gone through, he deserved long car trips with a happy ending and not this shit. 

In a heartbeat, Taako wished he was the one that could give it to him. A favor returned maybe, Kravitz brought him away from Moonville, he could bring Kravitz joy. 

Which. Taako bit his lip. There was no guarantee how this was going to end. After they’d gotten Angus then Kravitz might just decide to skip town and continue driving all over the country with him, leaving Taako to just go back to moonville with its neon signs and gas station hot chocolate. 

He had no way of knowing what Kravitz was planning, what he was thinking. He mattered  _ so much _ to Taako, and he just wanted to grab onto Kravitz and keep him by his side forever. He wanted them both to go on long car rides and stop by weird small diners so Angus could try out new food, he wanted to continue to buy coffee for Kravitz and listen to him talk about everything and anything. 

It took everything he had in him to not reach out and grab Kravitz hand right then and there, to run his fingers over his scarred knuckles and get his shoulders to relax, but he chose to just keep looking at him, forcing himself to commit the moment to memory as the car slowed down to a stop. 

Kravitz twitched in his seat, and looked back at Taako. He couldn’t see his eyes behind the sunglasses, but he could make out the movement of Kravitz jaw clenching and relaxing over and over again, before he finally sighed and made a move to open the door. 

Barry did the same thing, but Lup lingered behind with Taako. Both sitting quietly in the car for a moment, Lup’s hands still gripping onto the steering wheel hard. She exhaled, relaxed her hands and turned around in her seat and faced him. She was worried, he could tell that much, and he was sure he must have looked like a mirror reflection, both of them staring into each other's eyes. 

“We got this right?” She asked. Half confident, half afraid. “Like, this- it could end up being really dangerous. Cults aren’t yknow, known for being nice to outsiders.” 

“Um, yeah we totally got this. It’s just some light breaking and entering, and maybe kidnapping but I don’t even know if it counts because those assholes definitely started it.” In his lap his hands were moving on their own, picking at the skin around his nails and scarting the skin between his fingers. He was sure that Lup noticed it, but she made no indication to shift her eyes away. 

“Taako-”

“Lup listen. I don’t. I can’t think about what will happen if things go bad. So let’s just, uh, focus on the good ending yeah?” Taako hoped that the desperation he felt in his heart, tht  _ need  _ and  _ want  _ to keep Kravitz and Agus safe was showing on his face, that she could understand what he was feeling with just one look. 

Lup nodded once, short and sharp. “Okay, but just. If things go way south, promise me that you’ll get out. Race for the nearest exit ‘n’ keep running until you’re at a safe place.”

“Lup you know I-”

“Just promise me. Fuck Taako this is so freaky okay I don’t want to worry but I am so just promise me you’ll do your best to stay safe.” She was almost pleading with him, and Taako reached forward to grab her hand and held it tightly. 

“I promise.” He said, and she squeezed his hand hard, before letting go. 

“Right okay! Let’s do this. Let’s commit some crime.” Lup smiled at him and stepped out of the car, and he did the same. 

Outside, Kravitz was standing in the small alleyway, arms crossed and leaning against the brick wall of the building on the other side like the world's shadiest dealer. Beside him stood Barry dressed in, to everyone’s surprise, a pair of blue jeans and a blue shirt to match. He could have made a great walking advertisement for Levi’s, Taako observed. 

Walking up to Kravitz, Taako put his hands on his elbow, feeling him stiffen under his touch for a moment before he relaxed for a fraction. He could see one of Kravitz's eyes flicker to him, and he smiled, just a bit, before turning serious again. 

“Right, just follow me.” He turned and started to walk down the path, and Taako saw Barry and Lup exchange a glance before they all followed him. The alleyway wasn’t anything special, just a narrow street in the middle of two buildings, one normal and one painted like it was a carnival. But the closer they got to the door leading inside the church, Taako started to notice more and more smoked cigarettes littering the ground, their yellow ends littering the pavement like particularly ugly flower petals. 

“Nothing stronger than herbal tea huh.” Barry commented when they walked past, taking extra care to not step on any of the leftover pieces on the ground. 

“Well,” kravitz shrugged, took off the sunglasses and removed the hoodie, handing in back to Lup, leaving him in the balck shirt he’d worn underneath, “If you only sleep five hours a day and you’re not allowed to drink coffee, this is sorta the only way for the workers to relax. It’s the only place in the whole building that doesn’t have a security camera, and it’s much easier to smuggle a pack of cigarettes out on your break than to brew a glass of coffee.” 

“Dude. That’s so fucked up. So, like, no coffee at all?” 

“Not for the workers no. If you’re in the inner circle, after you’ve sacrificed enough, you can become an audience member, and then you’re allowed a bit more freedom, but you have to prove yourself first. Show that you’re willing to give everything you have to Wonderland, and then maybe you get some privileges.“ Kravitz explained, and stopped in front of a nondescript metal door with rusted edges, looking completely out of place among the colorful facade. 

“Audience member?” Taako cut in, and felt a chill run down his spine. This was it, the last moment before they would enter Wonderland. He trusted that Kravitz knew what he was doing, but it didn’t stop the nervous feelings from coursing around his body and causing his hands to shake. It was the exact opposite of kravitz, who, even as he was speaking, was standing completely still and barely moving a muscle in front of the door. Taako couldn’t imagine what he was thinking about at that moment. 

“They are in the audience for all the sacrifices, the closer to the front row the higher ranking you are.” He said, and proceeded to reach into the pocket of his pants and bring out a key. It was a small silvery thing, nothing too special, and if taako hadn’t known better he’d assume that it was the key to Kravitz home. 

In a way the key was to Kravitz’s home, he realized. This was the only place he’d ever known. And he’d left it, he’d grabbed his brother and escaped in a black car and spent countless hours on the road driving and driving just to get away from the place where he grew up, further and further away, only to be forced to return because he got comfortable in one place for too long. Because he befriended Taako. 

For a moment, Taako wanted to ask him about it, how he felt being back here, but he had a pretty good guess from how Kravitz was acting. 

“Were you an audience member?” Lup beat him to the chase with her question, and Taako shot her a look that she ignored. 

“Something like that.” Was the only answer she got, and Kravitz stepped closer to the door, took a deep breath, shoved the key into the keyhole and opened it. 

The room inside was half cast in shadow. There were no full lights on, only neon bulbs in different bright colors lining the walls and the floor, following a swirling pattern that connected at the far end of the room, where a giant blinking pink neon sign displayed the form of a bell. The walls were painted black, but with glow in the dark colors that reflected the lights in the room.

The whole place looked like it could have hosted a fashion show, with a long catwalk raised above the seats stretched towards the depiction of the Animus Bell where it connected to a stage with unlit spotlights lining the edge. The intensity in the colors rivaled the exterior walls, and even when the room wasn’t in use it was enough garnish colors to give Taako a headache. 

He could imagine the twins, Edward and Lydia, fitting right in, with their hair and ridiculous nails, a perfect stage to flaut power. 

Barry let out a low whistle. “Somehow I thought the inside would look better than the outside. Is every room decked out like this?” 

“Pretty much, there’s a strict color scheme to everything. The Sacrifice Room isn’t much different from this, only it’s a bit smaller, more… Intimate.” Kravitz grimaced and Taako did the same. 

“It’s super cool that they just got a space called the Sacrifice Room. Sounds absolutely inviting if you ask me.” He said, and enjoyed the sound of Kravitz giving a short laugh. 

“Naming things aren’t our- their best skill no.” Kravitz nodded his agreement, and lead them alongside the room to the opposite wall, past where two giant double doors were placed opposite of the stage, and to a door that was painted in the same color as the wall, and had it not been for Kravitz, Taako would have surely missed it. 

He opened it slowly, making sure that the hinges didn’t creek and ushered them all into the next room. He shut the door behind them and hit the light button, and the room was lit up by blue light bulbs, but Taako still had to squint to make out what the room contained. There were a bunch of chairs and desks stacked in one corner, and boxes upon boxes piled next to that, and almost taking up the whole room was a giant wheel of fortune. 

Kravitz looked over at him and followed his gaze. When he saw the wheel, he bit his lip. “Just, ignore that. It’s not the real thing, it’s just a prop.” He cleared his throat. “We need to get to the door on the other side of the hallway, there should be no people around- the service ended about half an hour ago and according to the rules nobody is allowed into this building then. Lup, could you look outside for a moment please, I don’t want to endanger you but we’ll be in a lot more trouble if they recognize me.” 

She nodded, and as carefully as Kravitz had done before, she opened the door to the corridor outside just a tiny bit, and pressed her face against the door and the frame. “I can’t see anybody.” 

She opened the door wider and slipped out, and Taako could barely hear her footsteps on the carpeted floor outside. He followed after her, and almost stopped to stare, the corridor was painted in neon rainbow pattern, stripped from the ceiling down the sides and even the carpet was matching. Blue followed by green followed by yellow followed by orange followed by pink followed by purple and over and over again as far as he could see. 

But he crossed to the other side with Barry in tow, both of them walking on the toes of their shoes to make as little sound as possible. 

When they reached Lup she’d already gotten the other door open, and motioned to them to get inside. Taako turned his head to see if Kravitz was behind him, but he’d stopped in the middle of the corridor. 

He wasn’t facing them, rather he was looking at the giant double doors that were the entrance to the sanctum. What a sight it must make to a worshipper, walking down the tunnel of neon to the open double doors, revealing the glowing Animus Bell at the end. A guiding star for the ones willing to sacrifice it all. 

Silhouetted against the bright colors, Kravitz looked like a shadow, a break that contrasted everything else around him. He looked so beautiful, and Taako felt himself choke up.

“Kravitz!” He hissed, and Kravitz twitched, like whatever was keeping him there in the middle of the corridor disappeared. He moved across the floor, not making any sound at all, and he looked almost confident brushing past the three of them and into the small room. It was like he’d said, a room for cleaning supplies with an ugly run on the floor. 

Kravitz crouched down and removed the rug, revealing a trap door with the words ’Follow the white rabbit’ written in green. Taako rolled his eyes. He’d never been a fan of cliche phrases, and right now it just looked tacky. “Nobody ever thinks it’s suspicious that the way to your secret lair is in the supply closet?” 

Hosting the trapdoor open with one hand, Kravitz waved away his comment with the other. “It’s to keep outsiders away. Only the true believers would be willing to overlook the strangeness of this, we- it was purposefully designed this way.”

Taako peered into the hole, and saw that there was a rope ladder leading down to the lower level, but the room was pitch black. He swallowed, and an icy feeling spread across his spine. “Are you sure it’s safe?” 

“No but… I don’t have any other choice. I have to get Angus back.” There was a determined look on his face, and once again he was tensing up, like he expected tako to fight him about it. 

“Yeah of course, it’s just, ya boy doesn’t have the greatest feeling about this.”

“It’s Wonderland Taako, it’s not made to create great feelings.” With that, he started to climb down the rope ladder while Taako watched hopelessly.

He looked to Lup and Barry and they all exchanged a look. Something didn’t feel right. Still, despite that, Lup shrugged her shoulders and made her way over to the edge, setting one foot down on the ladder. “If I scream, call the police.” She smiled and then made her way down. 

“This really doesn’t feel good. I’m not the only one that gets those vibes right?” Barry asked, and by his tone it sounded like he was joking but Taako could hear the light tremor in his voice. 

He shook his head. “Nah dude, it feels bad. But I mean, we’re in a cult so? Maybe it’s to be expected.” 

From the look on Barry’s face, he didn’t believe Taako. Not that Taako blamed him, the words tasted false in his mouth, but there wasn’t much else to say really, not when Kravitz and Lup were already downstairs, not when Angus' life was at stake. 

“Here goes nothing.” Barry muttered, and with one last look in Taako’s direction, he started to make his way down. Taako could hear the sound of Barry’s feet hitting the ground, and he swallowed, willing the bad feeling in his stomach to go away as he climbed down the rope ladder. As soon as his head was under the floor it was like he’d been dipped in nothingness. The space was pitch black, and he carefully tried to find the next step to set his foot on, but he found nothing. 

Fear rose in his throat and he fumbled around, desperately trying to find something to balance on when someone grabbed his ankle, stilling him and gently guiding his leg where he needed to go. Taako exhaled, and continued to climb down, only inhaling one he was standing on the solid floor. He couldn't see who it was that was standing beside him, but he could hear their breathing. “Hey thanks.” 

“You’re very welcome.” A high pitched, almost giggling voice said right next to his ear. It wasn’t Lup. Or Kravitz. Or Barry. 

Taako’s stomach lurched, and he scrambled backwards trying to reach for the ladder once more when the trap door above him slammed shut. The only thing he could feel was the stone wall behind him and the panic blooming in his chest.

For a moment longer, he was in complete darkness, before the lights flickered on, almost blinding him with their intense green color. He raised his arm to cover his eyes. Blinking a few times he lowered it, and the sight before him made him almost throw up. 

“It’s so nice to meet you again! Taako right? I hope you remember me from your little diner. I can see why Keats got attached to you, you look like you’d fit right in here! If it weren’t for the, let’s say circumstances at hand, I’m sure you’d make a great audience member.” Lydia smiled, and in the green light from overhead, her teeth looked like they were poisonous. “Or even a performer, like our dear Angus.”

Staring at her, with his back pressed against the cold wall,Taako felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest. This was a mistake. This had all been a mistake, he shouldn’t have come here. Fuck. Swallowing he tried to get his mouth to work. “I, um, I don’t know any dude named Keats.”

If possible, Lydia’s smile widened, and her eyes glowed with glee. “Oh but you do Taako dear. Our brother is a bit of a coward you see, he couldn't have anyone knowing he was related to us, how would that look? One of the founders of Wonderland, running away with one solution to hinder Tuesday’s doom day.”

Taako stared at her, taking in her dark eyes under the light's reflection, her high cheekbones casting dramatic shadows just like- “Kravitz.”

The laugh Lydia barked out sounded like shattered glass, and it echoes around the room and in Taako’s head. “You’re so smart. Yes, I regret to inform you that Keats hasn’t been entirely honest with you. But don't worry, now that he’s back home again I’m sure we can right all the wrongs.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) 
> 
> Yell at me on Tumblr at [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com)
> 
> please please let me know what you though about this chapter!!!! ahhhh I've been keeping this up my sleeve for so long!!!!!


	12. Kravitz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry im late with this chapter!! it took a while to write but im really proud of it!
> 
> It's not a multi-chapter fic by me if I don't switch pov to Kravitz for 1 chapter for the drama of it all 
> 
> warning for mentions of self harm

When Kravitz woke up, it was to the feeling of cool sheets against his body and his cheek pressed against a silk pillow. He could smell the laundry detergent, homemade with dried Lavender to make sleep come easier, used so often that even the mattress has the same scent after all these years. 

Soon his alarm would ring, and he hated waking up before it, because it meant that he’d miss out on precious sleep- he always did have such a problem falling back once he was awake. He’d be tired the whole day, it felt like after years of only sleeping so few hours each night would have made him resilient, but instead it felt like he’d gotten more and more exhausted as time went on. 

He rolled over, hiding his face in the pillow and sighing. There was no reason for him to even try and fight it, he knew exactly where he was expected to be as soon as the day started, and if he didn’t meet up Edward or Lydia in the conference room he’d be toast. 

Frowning into the pillow, he tried to remember what day it was. 

It was… Tuesday? 

Yeah it was Tuesday, and there was something that was going to happen, if only he could remember what it was. He tried to recall what it was, it felt important, like there was a big meeting or sacrifice game happening. He didn’t enjoy those days, when his siblings had planned something out. It made his skin crawl, just waiting for it all to be over, and having to interact with everyone else who were so excited for the upcoming event, so grateful to be a part of the honorable inner circle. 

On his left, the alarm clock started to ring, Kravitz exhaled and rolled out of the bed, almost getting tangled up in the sheets and falling over in the process. 

His head hurt, a lot, he noticed when he stood up, and black spots danced across his vision. It wasn’t anything unusual, he couldn’t remember what happened the day before, and perhaps it was for the better. Sometimes, when things got  _ bad  _ he just- he just went through the motions and then at midnight he would find himself in the back alley next to some other poor tired soul just smoking cigarette after cigarette, before he went to his room and collapsed in bed. 

Perhaps that was what had happened yesterday. Or maybe he had held a sermon, hours and hours of speaking and energetic gestures without a break for food or water. 

It didn’t matter though. Yesterday wasn’t what they focused on in Wonderland, it was the future. So Kravitz sighed once more and straightened out the clothes he’d apparently slept in. He didn’t know how he’d gotten away with wearing all black, it was against the dress code, but maybe he’d paired it with the blue neon cardigan thrown over his desk chair. 

Today, he didn’t feel like wearing any strong colors at all, and he was sure that just catching a glimpse of his reflection would make the low pounding around his temples so much worse than it already was. He grabbed the cardigan, if he’d gotten away with it yesterday he could probably do it again- even if he didn’t recall it. 

But when he put it on a faint layer of dust fell to the floor. Kravitz furrowed his eyebrows. There shouldn’t be dust on his clothes. Cleaning was mandatory and spontaneous checkups were the standard, to make sure that people followed the rules, and Kravitz was not the exception to the rules. He looked around, and everything in his room was covered in dust, swiping a finger along the side of his desk with its singular notebook and pen, he removed a faint layer, and on the floor next to the bed was an empty glass with gray circles on the bottom where the water had evaporated. 

Fuck. Okay. Kravitz closed his eyes and gripped his hair, trying to think over the horrible headache and dry taste in the back of his throat. He knew it was Tuesday. He did not remember any specifics about Monday, and nothing the day before that either. There was dust in his room, but it shouldn’t ever have gotten that dirty in the first place.

Dragging his hair down in front of his face, Kravitz opened his eyes- and stared. And stared. His hair wasn’t purple. The horrible neon purple that the twins had dyed his hair was replaced with his own black hair, tangled and curled in a way he hadn’t seen in forever. 

He ran into the bathroom connected to his room and it wasn’t just the stands he’d grabbed, his whole hair was  _ natural  _ again. There wasn’t a hint of purple anywhere, and it was his hair, not some fake wig because he could feel the pain in his roots when he pulled in it. If the twins saw him like this, with dark hair and dark clothes, they would kill him.

Once before, he’d spent hours with his hair under the tap, washing out a lime green dye until his hands and scalp had dried up from too much water and color removal shampoo. That rebellious phrase had lasted about two hours before Edward had seen him, and promptly grabbed him and dragged him to the sanctum, calling an emergency meeting for all Audience Members, so they could be there as he set an example for what happened with people who disobeyed the rules. Kravitz knuckles still had the scars from that, and they would hurt whenever he accidentally catched a glimpse of rulers. 

There was no way he’d repeat that. 

It had been the first time he’d seen Angus, sitting in the second row, looking horrified and confused, as the rest cheered for the performance put on by Edward. 

Angus. Tuesday. 

In the mirror, he watched the frustration grow on his face and the bright lights only fueled his headache on even more. Something was happening on Tuesday, and Angus was involved. Kravitz was involved too but he had to… stop it. Yes! That was it, he was going to take Angus, escape through the backdoor after there’d been a service, but he’d had to time it right, wait until all the people who smoked after a session were done, and avoid anyone seeing him and Angus going into the building during the restricted hours. 

Somehow… it felt like he’d already done that. He’d hidden a small go-bag under a multi-colored, two patterned coat and waited in the side room with Angus as the last person walked back inside, and then they’d slipped out, where he’d stuffed the coat in a trashcan and hidden his hair under a hat, and Angus had worn his most normal looking clothes and a pair of sunglasses that Kravitz had no idea where he’d gotten from. Many weeks earlier he’d stolen one of the car keys belonging to Wonderland, and right before he left he’d stolen a great sum of money from Lydia, both as a precaution and to spit her. 

He and Angus had managed to get away, he could remember that now, even if it felt hazy. They had driven around, stopping in one town for a night or two before moving on to the next. 

The journey hadn’t been easy. Both Kravitz and Angus had grown up in the church with it’s loud colors and closed community of people who only knew each other. It felt pathetic, being an adult and not knowing how to order food at a restaurant or barely how to pump gas. 

Hell, he’d had a nervous breakdown when he’d gotten the purple out of his hair, sitting in the bathtub at a shitty motel and staring at the stained water surrounding him, and he’d shoved his nails so far into the ruined skin of his knuckles that it started to bleed. Looking back on it, he was sure that Angus must have noticed it, the same way he noticed when Angus got overwhelmed by the different choices presented to him at a restaurant, or how both of them would just lay beside each other in whatever place they were staying during the night, or sitting in the car, breathing and trying so so hard to be  _ okay  _ with the fact that they were free.

Despite all the planning and preparation Kravitz had done, nothing had prepared him for the feeling of missing Wonderland. 

Sometimes he had woken up in the middle of the night, and he’d had to cling to the bedsheets to not give into the desire to go back to where he belonged- to his family. Because he had abandoned them, left behind everything he had his siblings had built up. It clawed in his chest just like he cut into his knuckles, the desperate wish to go back. 

Kravitz had never gone back though. He’d look at Angus, and he’d see the way he started to get a bit bolder every day, how he’d oh so slowly start to make requests, asking if they could maybe go to the library, or if Kravitz could get him a new shirt- one that wasn’t green and smelled like homemade fabric softener. 

Then, he’d stopped at a lit up diner at 2 a.m in the rain. Remembering it, he could see the tears form in his eyes, and he took a desperate breath. 

Meeting Taako had been  _ wonderful _ . His chest hurt, thinking about it. All the aimless driving and uncertainty had just stopped when they stopped in Moonville, for the first time in months he and Angus had a place to settle down, to finally for the first time in years breathe out. 

The happiness he’d felt in Moonville had made him careless, had made him want to stick around longer than they should have. But who could blame him? Angus was becoming his own person finally, not just doing what he was taught or what he thought was expected of him, and he’d started to sleep better, not the fitful five hours trained into him. Kravitz would sit on the sofa next to Angus and just listen to him talk with Lucretia and ask her questions about everything he wanted to know. 

Almost as unbelievable as that was Kravitz gaining a friend. For the first time in his life, he had a friend that only knew  _ him  _ and not whoever he was in Wonderland. Taako was so kind to them as well, despite all the weird stuff he and Angus would do, like not knowing anything about coffee, he still accepted them. And Taako might not have known where they’d come from, but it was evidential that he was just as excited as Kravitz when Angus started to order for himself and he would pay attention and joke with them both, showing them around town and getting them to feel like they were home. 

It didn’t last. There was no way that Kravitz should have been able to fool himself into thinking that, but he had. Rose tinted glasses, and all that. 

In hindsight he should have just left town when he first recognized the ar that turned out to belong to Edward and Lydia, but he’d gone to the diner wishing for a last dinner with Taako, maybe to give a good explanation for why they were leaving, to ask Taako to not forget him. 

Stupid really, to think with emotions when dealing with Wonderland. Kravitz had already learnt that the only way to survive was just to go on without feelings, how convenient that it should be what led him to get Angus out of Wonderland and then just as quickly got him sent back. 

Even more stupid to think that Lydia and Edward weren’t expecting him, that they hadn’t know exactly where he would look first. The worst part was that he's dragged not only Taako but Lup and Barry into the mess as well. Drugging someone wasn’t below their dignity, and the headache he was feeling was definitely from whatever they’d used to knock him out with when they went down to the Sacrifice Room. 

Looking outside he could see that the sun was shining. He’d been out for maybe half a day. The sacrifice would happen at midnight.

Kravitz took one last look at himself in the mirror before heading to the door. It was locked but Kravitz knew the lock was old and rusted, so he slammed his shoulder against the wood over and over again until it burst open. 

The familiar green painted walls greeted him outside, and he could see other members walking down the corridor stop and stare at him. 

He didn’t wait around to see if they would alarm anyone. He ran down the stairs, taking them two at the time and running through the options of where the twins could be keeping Taako and the rest. The twins might have been the ones that were running the cult, but Kravitz had been one of the leaders- he knew the whole place like the back of his hand. 

Kravitz had to get them all out of Wonderland, no matter what cost. He’d get them out from whatever hole the twins were keeping them in, and he wouldn’t let them sacrifice Angus, even if he would have to burn the church to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you all like it!!! 
> 
> When dealing with cults people often like to focus on the people who run them- but the most important people to focus on are the ones who's in the cult, the victims. In the end all cult leaders are the same, but it's the people who follow them and who suffer by their hands we need to listen to.   
I hope you take care of yourself and the people you hold close <3 
> 
> If you want to listen to an interview from a former scientologist i heavily recommend listening to **Oh No, Ross And Carrie's interview with Mike Rinder! ** It's on maximum fun and spotify, super interesting and he talks about why he left and how he was treated when he was in the church 
> 
> As always, find me on tumblr at [Newspapernom](https://newspapernom.tumblr.com)
> 
> <333


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